


Shoulder To Sleep On

by spazioaether



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Bus ride home, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-17
Updated: 2016-09-01
Packaged: 2018-03-18 06:33:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 27,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3559688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spazioaether/pseuds/spazioaether
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Matthew Williams commutes to college every day. On his way home one day, a certain Prussian ends up falling asleep on his shoulder.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Bus Ride Home

Matthew sighed lightly once he sat down on the bus seat. It had been a long day of classes and all he wanted to do was get home for some food and crawl into bed. A nap on the bus sounded heavenly, considering his home was an hour away from the college campus he attended. There was only one stop in between so he would not miss his stop by accident. The best part, he managed to nab a seat at the end of the bus which was the warmest. On either side of him was an empty seat which meant he didn't have to worry about his hockey gear or school bag getting in the way for anyone. But it was short lived when suddenly an onslaught of students and faculty made their way onto the bus. Moving most of his gear under his seat and his bag along with his hockey stick in between his legs, he waited for the seats to fill up. He recognized the one who sat on his left. The stranger was in the same computer programming class. If Matthew remembered correctly, he was an albino from Germany, but he told everyone he came from Prussia. On the right of Matthew, a petite girl carrying four bags herself, sat down, making herself comfortable. Now it was going to be a very long bus ride indeed.

Instead of worrying too much, Matthew pulled out headphones and juggled his hockey stick for a moment so he could pull out his phone. He quickly found his music before getting comfortable in the seat. Music would make the trip a little faster. If he was lucky, someone would actually text him, but he knew everyone still had one last class, or they were studying. Mid-terms were coming up, but Matthew had a whole weekend to study for the two he had. Still, not even his hockey mates would be available. They had discussed their plans for the weekend right before Matthew left the locker room to catch the bus. Normally there was some sort of party going on, but this weekend was about studying, since a few of the players had to be careful unless they wanted to be taken off the team, or even benched.

So Matthew stared out the right window to occupy his thoughts for a little. Most of the songs were older songs from the forties and fifties mostly. He had not gotten around to putting much more on his phone since he got it several months ago. More than once Alfred had accidentally switched their phones and there were times Matthew was stuck with the eccentric punk or rock music Alfred had mixed in with the occasional country song. Perhaps he should text Alfred to let him know he was on his way home. That way Alfred could have dinner finished by the time Matthew got there. But just as he reached for his phone, Matthew felt a warmth hit his left arm.

Glancing to the left, Matthew saw the self-proclaimed Prussian from earlier nodding off to sleep, but trying so hard to fight it. His arms were crossed over his chest and every time his head bobbed down, he would bring it right back up. It was a common occurrence on the bus to say the least. Even Matthew had fallen asleep against the window more than once or twice. There were times when Matthew ended up sleeping with his head slumped forward, creating a pain in his neck upon waking up. So he could sympathise with the other in the attempt to stay awake. But it seemed the Prussian was going to lose the battle, when the reaction to bring his head up grew farther apart.

Instead of tapping the poor man on the shoulder to wake him, Matthew slouched a little, using his hockey stick as a bit of leverage. Perhaps if he sat still, his shoulder would be low enough to stop the other from bouncing so much. Why he felt compelled to do so, was beyond Matthew's understanding, but he still felt rather pleased with himself.

The Prussian continued to fight a losing battle. It took another three songs in Matthew's play list to go by until he felt a little weight on his shoulder. Smiling to himself, Matthew made sure to look out the window to his right. If he could help the other for just a bit Matthew was fine with that. But curiosity got the better of him and he glanced down at the other. Snow white hair reminded him of the first snow fall that no one had touched early in the morning. He had to fight the urge to run his fingers through the other's hair to see if it was just as soft. Looking away and back to the window, a light blush dusted his cheeks. Thankfully no one really noticed him. It seemed as if a nap was in order for him as well as he sat there and yawned.

* * *

A movement beneath his head made Matthew stir. Eyes fluttering open, he noted the snow white colour filling his vision. Sitting up, he found the blush from earlier quickly returning, filling his whole face. He had managed to fall asleep on top of the Prussian’s head. Feeling quite embarrassed, he quickly made to get up in order to leave the bus, but a hand gripping the end of his shirt stopped him. Turning his head, Matthew saw crimson eyes with a bit of pink towards the centre. It at first unnerved him until he remembered the other was albino and it was a natural colour for the Prussian.

"Wait," came the reply. His German accent was thick, but still understandable.

"The bus driver is waiting for us to get off the bus. You better hurry," Matthew said, picking up his school bag and hockey gear. He then quickly took his leave of the bus, waving at the driver in passing.

"Wait!"

Matthew did not wait for the Prussian, instead he fished out his keys from his pocket and made for his car so he could drive home. He heard a few more attempts of the other calling him, but Matthew dared not to stop until the other suddenly dashed in front of him. Blinking, Matthew stopped and took a defensive step back.

"Geez, you don't have to run away you know," the Prussian said. He took a few breaths before he continued. "Look, sorry I feel asleep on your shoulder. I just didn't want you to leave and not let me apologize."

"It's...umm...fine. No really," Matthew said. He had no intention of telling the other he allowed it. "I should probably apologize for sleeping on you myself."

"Heh. The name's Gilbert Beilschmidt. I know we're in the same computer class, but I ever got the chance to talk to you so I'm glad we finally get the chance to meet." He grinned widely, his bag flung haphazardly over his shoulder and a soccer ball under his other arm.

"You are?" Matthew was confused at the statement but felt his heart pound a bit faster.

"Sure. I admire your work and wanted to ask if you could help me with a bit of the coding that I'm having trouble with. You probably know how it is, one line of error comes out to like nine-hundred problems." Gilbert shrugged, his grin never fading.

"Yeah, I can help you. But it's kinda late-"  
"Great! Give me your number and we can meet up some time this week for coffee and talk codes," Gilbert said. He then cackled a little as he pulled out his phone. "Here we go."

"Right. I'm Matthew Williams by the way," Matthew said, feeling no way of politely turning down the offer. Although, he was a little glad the other was so straight forward. "Sure, I'm free on Friday."

"Nice name. Hey, so am I. I'll text you a time we can meet up. I'll pay for coffee since I'm the one who fell asleep first." Gilbert plugged in Matthew's phone number and sent a text message so Matthew new who it was. He then put his phone away and turned to leave for the second floor of the parking garage. "By the way, thanks for letting me use your shoulder."

Matthew could feel his face heat up as Gilbert walked away, cackling. Matthew shook his head and went to his car. Had Gilbert known that lowering his shoulder had been on purpose?


	2. Pancakes Instead of Beer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because a few people asked for more. I decided to humour them along with myself. I might add more to this, but at the moment I don't have much of a plot so the writing will probably go rather slow. Since I've added a few more characters into the fray, I'll post them up if they end up becoming rather important to the plot and such. But for now it's going to be mostly about Matthew and Gilbert. If you guys have any suggestions, let me know! Either through comments or through [tumblr](http://invisiblegerman.tumblr.com), ask. Anyway, enjoy.

Pacing back and forth in his small bedroom Matthew sighed for what seemed to be the hundredth time that day. It was Friday, the day he was supposed to meet up with Gilbert, but the hoser had yet to send a text message about a time. There were so many things Matthew wanted to say about the whole situation, but mostly he was just miffed at himself for actually getting his hopes up. It wasn’t like this was a date or something, it was just supposed to be a get together for Matthew to help Gilbert with his coding.

Checking his phone one last time, he tossed it on the bed, deciding to do something else for the rest of the afternoon. If Gilbert had forgotten, Matthew was not going to remind him. Leaving his room, Mathew went straight to the kitchen where Alfred sat on one of the bar stools, his upper body lying on the counter.

The two lived in a two bedroom apartment. Their neighbours varied from different parts of the world, including Francis from France and Arthur from England. The two were constantly fighting about something, but were some of the best people to go to for advice on life situations. On the other side of Matthew’s apartment lived Kiku, from Japan and Yao from China. Kiku normally played video games or read comics with Alfred, while Yao usually shared tea and sweets with Matthew and Arthur at times. The rest of the apartment was made up of other people from different parts of the world, which meant it was never a dull moment. Unless of course half the complex had mid-terms they either had to study for, or grade, in the case of Arthur who was a professor at the local community college.

“What’s wrong Al?” Matthew asked, heading towards the pantry to see if they had anything to make pancakes with. It was something he could eat all day, every day, and never grew tired of.

A grunt came from the general direction of Alfred before he shifted slightly. “Bored and hungry”

 “Yeah? I’m making some pancakes and bacon”

“Great! Make me some too!” Alfred sat up straight and watched Matthew gather the materials to make pancakes. “Wait, you’re making bacon with it? You usually only cook bacon when you either apologise for something or you’re pissed off about something.”

“Still can’t cook for yourself?” Matthew glanced back at Alfred with a playful grin.

“I can cook better than Arthur that’s for sure,” Alfred said with a shrug of his shoulders before both snickered for a moment. “Although he bakes rather well. But hey! Don’t dodge the question. What’s going on?”

“So I’ve heard. He’ll have to—”

Matthew’s phone sung a song from Frank Sinatra as he stood mixing the batter for pancakes. Giving Alfred a pleading look, Alfred scooted off the bar stool to grab the phone. Matthew wondered who it could possibly be, when Five Minutes More stopped playing and Alfredo greeted the caller he was ready to pour the batter into the pan. It took another minute or two for Alfred to return.

“Sure, he’s just making pancakes. Hold on.” Alfred held the phone to Matthew’s ear as Matthew continued watch the pancakes, lest he burn them.

It was nice to live with someone who had essentially grown up with each other. There was no need to ask if they could hold up the phone while cooking, or to do something for them when they were busy. Alfred and Matthew had always been close cousins, from having close birthdays and celebrating them together, to visiting each other during the summer holidays. It was only natural for the two to end up going to college together; their parents were delighted since both would keep the other out of too much trouble. Matthew was taken on for the hockey team and given a full ride scholarship, while Alfred got in playing soccer mostly along with his excellent testing scores. Alfred had found the rather cheap apartment, but forgot to mention how far away it was from the college, but since the bus fare was free, neither complained too much.   

“H-Hello?” Matthew asked, wondering why Alfred had not told the other who was on the phone.

“Ah! Matthew, you have no idea how hard it is to get a hold of your phone number. Do you? You need more friends who have it I swear. Listen, my phone was murdered yesterday by some crazy accident that involved me climbing a tree to save a bird. Why did you never text me? Wait, don’t answer that I got a different number anyway! First off can I come over to get some help with my homework? I know it’s kind of late, but I really could use the help.” It was hard to understand every word over the phone with Gilbert rushing and his rather thick accent.

“Wait, you were in an accident? Are you alright?” Matthew asked, Alfred looked a little concerned at the phone. He mouthed the words is he alright to Matthew who only shook the hand with the spatula to tell Alfred to wait a moment.

“Ja. I’ll tell you all about it if you let me come over. Bitte?”

Matthew sighed, but nodded his head, forgetting he was on the phone. Realising his mistake, he quickly cleared his throat. “Yes, that’s fine. Listen I’m making pancakes, so I’ll make enough for you as well. Alfred can tell you the directions to get here.”

“Sounds good. Thanks again Matthew!” Matthew could hear the relief and just picture a bright smile on Gilbert’s face.

Alfred put the phone against his ear and took a few steps away from Matthew as he focused on the pancakes. So the Prussian had not forgotten him after all. Now Matthew just felt plain silly for getting so worked up, but he was a little concerned if Gilbert was alright if he had been in an accident. The scent of slightly burning pancakes caught Matthew’s attention before too long and brought him out of his thoughts.

“You better hurry up with those pancakes. It won’t take him that long,” Alfred said, a rather teasing grin on his face.

“What do you mean by that eh?”

“I mean, he lives like two floors below us.”

“Eh?” Matthew turned to face Alfred who just laughed boisterously.

“You heard me. He lives two floors down from us. Never knew that.” Alfred shrugged and went to the door, expecting it to ring any moment.

Mouth slightly agape, Matthew tried to comprehend what he had just been told. Why had he not seen the other until just the other day? When did Gilbert move into the apartments? Who was his roommate? So many questions. Matthew flipped the pancake before it burned and placed it on a neat stack he had prepared. Pouring more batter into the pan, he decided to ask some of the more polite questions when Gilbert actually got there.

“By the way, Al?”

“Yeah, what’s up Mattie?” Alfred asked, leaning against the wall.

“Could you possibly stay in your room or just go out for a bit while he’s here? We’re supposed to do homework and knowing how you are, you’ll just distract him.” Matthew turned his back to Alfred, not wanting to see hurt reflected in his eyes, but was rather surprised by the answer.

“Sure thing! I can take the pancakes and eat them at Franny and Artie’s place. I’ll just rub it in that I have pancakes and bacon.”

“Thanks Al,” Matthew said, knowing Alfred understood Matthew wanted some time alone with their guest instead of being overshadowed like he normally was in Alfred’s presence when others were around.

As Matthew started to cook the bacon, putting pancakes on another plate just for Alfred, the doorbell rang. The door opened and Alfred greeted Gilbert, allowing the other to come in. Swallowing thickly, Matthew took a deep breath to relax.

Matthew felt a hand on his shoulder, making him jolt from the contact. Turning, Gilbert snickered at him before giving him a small hug. A blush crept its way on Matthew’s cheek. Alfred muffled his laughter in his hands.

“Hallo,” Gilbert said, releasing Matthew from the hug and stepping back. “West said to bring a gift, so I brought beer. You guys are old enough to drink right?”

Both shook their heads and Gilbert smack his forehead. 


	3. Poison Cooking

Matthew saw Alfred off before making pancakes for Gilbert and himself. Gilbert found himself leaning against the counter while occupying the bar stool to watch. Matthew was used to people watching him while he cooked so he paid no mind. Piling up the pancakes and the slices bacon once they were finished, he placed on a plate and brought them over to the eager Prussian.

“Pancakes and bacon,” Matthew said, grabbing plates from a cabinet before sitting down next to Gilbert on a bar stool.

“What kind are they?” Gilbert asked, glaring at them distrustfully for a moment before piling a few on his plate. He flipped the first one over to inspect it.

“Normal pancakes?”

“Apple then?” Gilbert found that underneath the pancake was just as smooth and fluffy as the top. “Mattie, I think you forgot something in the pancakes.”

“Gilbert, have you never had pancakes like these before?” Matthew asked as he watched the Prussian, brows furrowed in confusion.

Gilbert shook his head. “Normally pancakes like these have fruit in them, like cherries or apples, otherwise they are thin with Nutella in them.”

“Well, these are Canadian pancakes and best with some maple syrup. Here,” Matthew said, pouring a bit of the sugary substance he got from care packages his mother sent from Canada, over Gilbert’s pancakes. “Try it.”

Nodding his head, Gilbert cut a small piece and chewed it slowly. Matthew watched as crimson eyes widened and a grin graced Gilbert’s face. Feeling elated, Matthew started piling his own pancakes to eat. He was always happy to help people understand why the stereotype about Canadians and pancakes with maple syrup existed. The dish was easy to make and tasted delicious.

An hour passed with Matthew having to make more pancakes for Gilbert. They talked about mundane things for the most part until Gilbert had finally set up his laptop to start on the dreaded coding homework. The laptop was placed on the counter once all the dishes were cleared away with the help of Gilbert, who declared it was his chore at his own apartment and would feel offended at not being allowed to help. It gave Matthew time to grab his own laptop from his room along with his notebook filled with notes from the class.

“Mattie,” Gilbert said, already using the nickname Alfred had called Matthew before he left. “I’m so full, I don’t know if I’ll stay awake for this.”

“You sound a lot like Alfred,” Matthew said, moving away from his laptop. “Get started while I make a pot of coffee.”

If Alfred was anything to go by, a good cup of coffee would remedy the food coma. So Matthew pulled over the coffee pot to start a fresh brew. Perhaps when this was all over there would still be some left for Alfred when he returned.

“Fine. I need help with the second part of the assignment where we have to write a program that takes two integer-command arguments,” Gilbert said as he pulled up the worksheet on his laptop.

“That one is a little difficult. Do you by any chance know where your error is?” Matthew asked, as he moved over to the counter and leaned over to see the computer screen. “If you do it helps me.”

“I have some idea.” Gilbert quickly brought up search function and typed in a series of characters to find the line of error. “This one.”

Adjusting his glasses, Matthew turned the computer towards him to read over the lines of code. He had already finished the assignment without too much of a hassle, but with coding one never knew when a line of error was going to occur and create havoc on the program itself.  But upon further investigating the codes, Matthew honestly had trouble finding anything wrong with it. 

“Gilbert, you have the same thing written as I do. The whole code is right. Are you sure you had an error with his one?” Matthew opened up the program to let it run, finding that it worked just fine.

“Really?” Gilbert said, a smug smile graced his lips as he leaned on the counter. “Guess it just needed your touch.”

Matthew sighed before closing his own laptop. If there was nothing he could help with, it was pointless to even have the thing up. Gilbert’s grin at first faltered for a moment before he looked genuinely worried.

“Did you really need help with the homework?” Matthew asked, wondering if they even needed coffee anymore.

“Not really,” he said with a shrug. “I actually figured out what was wrong with the code last night. It turned out I just forgot to close one of the lines properly. But since I asked for the help and all I thought I would still show up but then my phone broke and I learned you lived two floors up from me, how could I resist not just hanging out?”

“You could have just said so. Alfred wouldn’t have to stay over at the neighbours, who knows how he’s ruffling Arthur’s feathers at the moment,” Matthew said with a heavy sigh, running a hand through his honey blonde hair.

“Sorry,” Gilbert said, the look of a kicked puppy would have been a good comparison to his face as Matthew stood there wondering what to do with the Prussian. “West said that I should keep promises I made, so I wanted to make sure we still got the chance to hang out.”

“It’s fine. You didn’t do anything bad besides bring beer to minors,” Matthew said with a smile on his face. If only people would care enough to have common sense every once in a while. “You are taking that home with you right?”

“I said I was going to. I just thought—You look old enough to drink,” Gilbert said, crossing his arms over his chest. “How was I supposed to know you and Alfred were under the age still? Besides, why are Americans such sticklers when it comes to alcohol anyway? It’s not like Germany is teeming with raging drunk teenagers.”

“I guess it’s because I’ve been playing hockey since I was small. It’s kept me in shape over the years. I’m actually one of the youngest players this season,” Matthew said rather proudly.

“Sweet! Do you play soccer?” Gilbert asked, pulling out his wallet from his back pocket. “West and I used to play on a local team back in Germany.”

“Can’t say that I have. I’ve watched the world cups though if that counts for anything.” Matthew looked at the small picture of Gilbert when he was in his early teens and a boy who only reached Gilbert’s torso, with sandy blonde hair and icy blue eyes. “This is West eh?”

“Yup that’s him! My one and only kleiner bruder.”

“Why do you call him West? That’s not really his name is it?” Matthew watched Gilbert take the picture in his hand for a moment before putting it back in his wallet.

“When we were younger and played soccer, West became his nickname. Not because he was born in western Germany, but because when he played on the field, the western half was his dominant side. If we played on the west, we were unstoppable. His real name is Ludwig,” Gilbert said, his crimson eyes shining like a proud mother would do for her son. “I played centre for the most part until I would get too sunburned for the coach’s taste. But enough about me. If you’re mad I can head out.”

Matthew blinked at the Prussian for a moment. He was not angry in the least bit, just a little disappointed he could not help Gilbert. It was nice to feel needed, even if it was something as small as for a homework assignment. But if Gilbert had been willing to hang out with Matthew he would take the opportunity to make friends.

“You can stay. You promised to tell me the story of what happened to your phone eh? And I just made coffee so,” Matthew said as he wondered what kind of ridiculous story Gilbert had come up with to explain the situation.

“Right! I even have the broken phone to prove this one.” Gilbert fished out the broken phone to show Matthew. “So I was coming back from the bus like you were, but you must have gotten past all the traffic. Anyway, there’s this tree right outside by the parking lot. I normally stop and watch the birds there since I like bird watching. But they were learning to fly and one of the eggs hatched late. So it was smaller than the others. By the time it tried to fly I could already tell it wasn’t ready yet, so when it started to fall I had to catch him!”

“Oh, and that’s when your phone broke?” Matthew asked, blinking at Gilbert. Had there really been a bird’s nest in that tree? Matthew parked under it long enough to remind himself of some of the presents the bird’s liked to leave on his windshield.

“Nope. I climbed up the tree to put the poor flustered birdie back up in the nest. Afterwards I ended up falling and landed on my phone. That’s why I said it was freak accident. After all that, it broke because I fell out of the tree instead.”

Matthew giggled a little as he watched Gilbert make hand signals to indicate the falling action before bursting into laughter.

“Gilbert, that’s called irony, not a freak accid—”

The doorbell rung, bringing Matthew’s attention to the door, wondering who it could have been. A quick glance to Gilbert’s frown and questioning face made Matthew a little weary going to the door. Was Alfred expecting someone? Looking through the small peep hole upon reaching the door, Matthew shook his head and opened it to reveal Alfred with a very grumpy British gentleman, Arthur.

“Good afternoon Arthur,” Matthew said with a sheepish smile, but it quickly faded with how furrowed Arthur’s brows were.

“I don’t care who you have in the apartment, or if you were about to shag or whatever. Just take this git back before I really do kill him,” Arthur said, shoving Alfred through the door and into the apartment before heading back to his own door. Matthew heard him mutter darkly to himself. “Insult my cooking does he? Well maybe next time I’ll just bake a poisonous cupcake or two.”

“Al, what did you tell Arthur?” Matthew said after closing the door and turned to see Alfred standing there, ringing his wrists nervously. Gilbert had moved to the coffee pot, with a cup in hand to get some of the coffee Matthew had made. “Why does he think I’m having sex with Gilbert?”

“Sex? Wow, that was pretty fast! I haven’t even gotten to first base with you,” Gilbert said with a cackle, pouring the coffee before checking the fridge for creamer.

Matthew felt his face go red, having forgotten it was rather quiet in the room and Gilbert was within hearing distance. The heat on his face certainly did not help any matters as Alfred just stood there trying to contain his laughter.

“No—Umm, Al!”

“What? Artie said it, not me,” Alfred said to defend himself. “Take it up with him.”

“Relax Mattie. It’s probably only because it’s Arthur. I used to hang around him back when he didn’t always have a stick up his ass. Although with how flustered you look I think I’ll start calling you birdie from now on.” Gilbert grinned at the idea as he began to collect his belongings. “Yup, from now on you’re Birdie!”

“Eh?” Matthew stood still, trying to comprehend what was happened. “You’re joking right?”

“Nope!” Gilbert’s smile only widened as Matthew groaned at the strange new nickname he had acquired. He sipped at the coffee in his cup. “Alfred there’s coffee if you want some.”

“Oh great!” Alfred said before quickly making his way to the cupboard in order to find a cup.

“Oh no you don’t Al. You have to fix this mess with Alfred!” Matthew placed his hands on his hips.

Alfred groaned but continued to pour his coffee. Gilbert finished off the cup of coffee he had before turning toward Matthew with a grin.

“We should do this again sometime and maybe even with the “shagging,” or whatever Arthur calls it.”

“What? You’re joking right?” Alfred said, spinning around to meet Gilbert, who was just a few inches shorter.

“Who knows,” Gilbert said with a knowing smile as he headed out the door laughing.

“Alfred!” Matthew yelled at the other, who quickly ran to the couch to grab a pillow to defend himself with.


	4. I'm Not Gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've decided to actually invest a plot to this besides just grasping for straws. It's going to be a bit slow as they build their friendship and there of course are always ups and downs when it comes to that, especially when you know your best friend is in love with you. Anyway, if you have suggestions as far as some interactions between the two let me know through my tumblr, invisiblegerman, or through a comment. I can't guarantee that I will use it, but I'm open to ideas. Ah, the chapters will start to get longer as they continue their interactions and such. Enjoy and feel free to leave comments. I do try to get to everyone of them! :D

Matthew took a deep breath. He and Alfred had continued to fight with pillows for quite some time after Gilbert left before finally calling a truce. Their apartment was littered with bits of feathers from the pillows and the furniture slightly turned in different directions from vaulting over them or escaping to the other side. Matthew started cleaning up the mess while Alfred lay on the floor still laughing.

"I'm surprised no one came up and said anything about our fight," Matthew said with a small smile in Alfred's direction.

"Yeah I know right? Guess because it doesn't happen too often they don't mind?" Alfred said still trying to regain his breath.

"But you know Alfred, we still need to talk to Arthur about what he said earlier." Matthew took the broom and dust pan from the closet and began to sweep up the loose feathers.

"I know, but can we do it when he's not mad at me? Besides why are you so bent out of shape about it anyway?" Alfred asked between breaths. He was still doubled over from laughing too hard at Matthew's attempts to get him from across the living room table.

"I mean it Al. Why did he even think that in the first place? He knows I'm straight right? I'm only concerned because well, sometimes people do things for fun and I don't want to be the end of someone's joke." Matthew said, as he absentmindedly tossed the dust pan at Alfred, who caught it just in time to save his face before shrugging.

In the past, Matthew had been hurt by a crush he had on a girl back in sophomore year of high school. She had gotten close to Matthew. Her friends wanted to use Matthew to get to Alfred in a way, but thankfully Alfred was privy to their plans and stopped it before it was too late. Yet, Matthew was still having trouble with trusting anyone who declared they had feelings for him. The incident was why Matthew had not taken interest in any sort of romantic relationship with anyone.

"I guess? I mean we don't talk much about our love life unless Francis points the conversation in that direction. But it's not like any of us really openly said what, or I guess who, we preferred," Alfred said, holding the dust pan on the ground for Matthew to sweep the feathers into it.

The two relapsed into silence for a moment. Alfred was right, but then Matthew had stopped advances from Francis, who respected both their wishes after Matthew and Alfred's first time over. Matthew knew Alfred went for advice a few times when it came to answering a letter or two from a crush at the university, but he had never gone himself. In fact, Matthew had very little experience in the department of romance. Most of the admirers went to Alfred. There were times when he was confused for Alfred and had gotten the confessions, but he set the girls straight so they would go to Alfred instead. The only time he really had a date, was probably the girl from his last prom.

Matthew's parents pestered him about having a date for the last prom in his high school and Alfred had managed to find a wallflower who was more than happy to go with Matthew. The two had spent most of the night together and even kissed once. Neither had seen each other afterwards, much to Alfred's dismay.

The living room was put into place when Matthew checked the time on his watch. It was still early enough to pay Arthur a visit. Grabbing his keys from the small bowl sitting on a commode right before the door he looked at Alfred. The bowl helped to keep keys from getting lost most days.

"I'm going to head over to Arthur's apartment. Want to come so you can apologise to him?" Matthew asked as he put on his shoes.

"Yeah, but honestly I just want to know the answer to your questions," Alfred said, hiding behind Matthew. "Just don't let him see me first. The last time he almost punched me in the face."

"You should know by now not to insult his cooking," Matthew said with a sigh.

He led the way over to Arthur's apartment and knocked on the door. Alfred's signature bomber jacket poked out at Matthew's sides making the hiding place useless as the door slowly opened to reveal Francis and not Arthur.

"—cohol is not good for you mon cher!" Francis said to Arthur, who must have started drinking rather early for the weekend.

"Thank you mum, but I think I'm old enough to know when I can drink or not," Arthur called out as the three at the door heard the bottle open with a pop and rush of air blast forth.

"I'm sorry, but could you— Oh! Matthew how was the date?" Francis asked happily as he ushered the two into the apartment.

Francis wore a rather long night gown with long sleeves and slippers. Matthew was about to protest about coming back in the morning as Alfred waltz right in and made himself comfortable on the couch. Francis said he would bring some sweets and something to drink for them all before disappearing into the kitchen area.

Looking about, Matthew spotted Arthur sitting in his professor attire of a dark green sweater vest and kahki pants, a beer bottle in his hands. There was a stack of paper on the little coffee table with a red pen sitting on top of it. Matthew hoped for the sake of Arthur's students that he was not going to grade their essays while drinking.

Nothing nothing had changed since his last visit, Matthew made himself comfortable on the couch. The décor belonged to Francis, who deemed Arthur unfit to decorate the apartment with style. Lining the walls were bookshelves where the money Arthur had not spent on furniture, was spent on books instead. Many bore titles Matthew had never heard of and just went to prove Arthur's serious nature about his job as an English professor.

"So, what brings you two here?" Francis asked pleasantly as he put a tray of macaroons and apple juice for Alfred and Matthew.

"Just about something Arthur said earlier," Alfred said quietly, hoping Arthur had not heard. He shrunk into the couch as Arthur glared at him after tipping the beer bottle back a little. "Are you sure you should be drinking Artie. You get a little hostile."

"I can hold my liquor thank you. Now what could I have possibly said? I was under the impression a young American owed me an apology." Arthur placed his beer bottle down on the table. He replaced it with a macaroon Francis had baked earlier that day, glaring at it as if it gave some offensive remark before eating it.

"Yeah. About that, look Arie I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you mad, I just don't get why you gotta cook when I already had pancakes," Alfred said. His cerulean eyes never met the Briton's emerald ones, and he wrung his hands together as Matthew watched them. Alfred was lying about being sorry, but then again Matthew would have a hard time coming up with a truth about Arthur's cooking unless it was his baking.

"I see."

Arthur stayed silent after that and Alfred looked at Francis for guidance who only shrugged with a frown, unsure of what to make of the response. Matthew shifted a little nervously on the couch, wondering how to bring up his own topic.

"Matthew, do you have something to say?" Francis prompted, giving the Canadian a reassuring smile.

"I do. Arthur?" Matthew asked, waiting for Arthur to look at him curiously. "Why did you think Gilbert and I were…"

"Shagging? Because he said he liked you and I told him there might have been a chance for him. So when he told me this morning he had a date with you I assumed it would happen. I've known him for quite some time," Arthur said, thick brows knitted together in confusion at the question. "Why?"

"He's not gay Artie," Alfred said with a frown. "What made you think that?"

"I could have sworn— Wait, you're not? Blimey Matthew! I'm so sorry," Arthur sat there, blinking in disbelief. "It's just I never saw you with a girl and you never talked about anyone special so I must have just assumed. What have I done?"

"Arthur calm down," Francis said putting a hand on Arthur's shoulder. "It was an honest mistake."

Matthew sat there blinking at Arthur before giggling. So it had just been a misunderstanding on Arthur's part. Sure it was not ideal to have Gilbert think there was a chance, but at least Matthew understood what was going on. Alfred raised an eye brow a little concerned about Matthew's response. Waving his hand to disregard the look, Matthew calmed himself down.

"I just thought it might have been a joke. Honestly, Gilbert is the first friend I've made in a while Arthur. That's all it was, just him coming over to get help with homework. I'll make sure to clear it all up with him in the morning though." Matthew smiled.

"Mon petit, are you sure about this?" Francis asked, watching Matthew carefully. "Can you really just brush this off so easily?"

Matthew nodded. Knowing it was not just some joke to pass the time, but rather Gilbert truly had an interest in him. Matthew was rather flattered to say the least, but he still would set the Prussian straight. They could remain friends if that's what Gilbert wanted, but Matthew highly doubted anything more would come out of their friendship. Once he was home, he would make sure to text Gilbert to explain what was going on. For now, he enjoyed the macaroons Francis had made and the apple juice, oblivious to the worried glances between Francis and Alfred.

"If you say so Matthieu. Now, what are you two boys up to this weekend?" Francis asked, to try and lighten up the mood for everyone. Arthur remained silent, glaring at the bottle on the table.

"Studying. Its mid-terms week starting next week. It's going to be a drag. I heard most of the sports teams not in season are canceling practice, so that players are able to study," Alfred said, stretching as he sat more comfortable on the couch.

"For the hockey players we start back up once all the main players are done, so around Wednesday for us. There was supposed to be a party this weekend, but it was shoved to next weekend. So I'll be studying as well," Matthew said, happily munching away at his macaroon.

Francis nodded his head at them both. "I see. Shall I bake some snacks to help you and the rest of the complex with their studies?"

"Could you?" Alfred asked. "I know you must be busy with your own shop and all, but that would be pretty awesome!"

"Yes please."

"Alright it is settled then. I shall happily make something for everyone. I'll leave them in brown bags with names on them in the front lobby when they're done. Tell people when you see them oui?" Francis asked as he pulled out a small notebook to write down what he was going to bake.

"Thanks," both boys said as they grinned at each other. Francis did not often bake for free and so on the rare occasion it did happen, everyone tended to be grateful. Especially since Francis made the sweets with a bit of caffeine in them or something healthy to boost the mind for exams.

After a few more minutes of eating and small talk, Arthur decided it was time for the two to leave. The excuse was because of paperwork, but Matthew wondered if it was because of how many macaroons Alfred had eaten while Arthur only glared. Saying goodnight, the pair went back to their apartment.

"Guess I'll head to bed. I'm going over to Kiku's to get some help with a few of the harder math problems. After that I'll go shopping for the groceries. It's my turn this week right?" Alfred said, yawning as he rubbed his abdomen, full from the macaroons.

"Yes, it's your turn. I'll probably just study here at the apartment. I might go out for some coffee though. Good night Al," Matthew said as he headed to the kitchen to retrieve his phone.

He still needed to text Gilbert. Making his way into his bedroom, he flipped on the light before flopping onto his bed. Patting his stuffed polar bear on the head, Matthew wondered what he should say to Gilbert. Unlocking his phone, Matthew saw the notification light blink at him. He had three messages.

**Awesome Gilbert**

Just wanted to check that everything was okay. When I went to the front desk I heard something about a noise complaint. I made sure to explain you two were just moving some furniture around to clean.

**Awesome Gilbert**

Okay, so are you mad at me about the whole shagging thing? I was only kidding. I would never make you do something like that.

**Awesome Gilbert**

Mattie? Are you really that mad at me?

Feeling guilty over not having his phone, Matthew began typing a reply, hoping Gilbert had not already gone to bed. It took him a good ten minutes to figure out what to say and even then he was disjointed about the message. He was unsure of how to approach the topic, but then again, Gilbert had been honest with him and so Matthew felt he could do the same. Now it would just be a matter of Gilbert not getting too upset when he learned the truth of the whole matter and hopefully still wanted to be friends. Having taken almost a year to make any new friends who were not met through Alfred, he was rather proud of himself. Now he just had to keep it and make sure that nothing got muddled into their friendship.

**Maple Lover**

I'm sorry. I'm terrible at keeping my phone around, but I'm not mad at you. I was over at Arthur's place to clear up the fact that I'm not gay. I'd still like to be friends though.

Matthew waited for a moment before putting his phone down and got ready for bed. Pulling on an oversized shirt he liked to wear to bed, Matthew's phone vibrated and played a small tone to signal he had a message.

**Awesome Gilbert**

I'm glad you're not mad at me. I'm way too awesome for that right? Anyway, so Arthur told you? The traitor. Either way, I won't push you into something you don't want Mattie. Of course we can be friends, just know that I don't give up so easily. If I have to wait for a very long time before you realise that I'm better for you than anyone else that's fine. But for now we can be friends.

Flopping on his side, Matthew read the text message over a few times. Gilbert was not going to give up on him? What did that even mean anyway? Matthew sighed. Did it matter? As long as Gilbert kept true to his word about not pressuring him, then it would be okay. Besides, he said the two of them could still be friends and that was a start. Perhaps Matthew could help him find a significant other. For now, Matthew turned off his lights and curled under the blankets. Unsure of how this relationship was going to work, he texted Gilbert once more, before rolling over to sleep.

**Maple Lover**

I'm afraid you'll be waiting a long time for that Gilbert. Friends sounds nice though, it's been awhile since I've made a friend.


	5. Sassy Computers and Hockey Practice

It was Wednesday and Matthew finished all his mid-term exams. They went well, with him only worrying about one class about philosophy because of having to memorise all the names of certain philosophers. But the exam went as well as it could have gone and he would just have wait until the results were posted before he scolded himself for not studying harder.

He rubbed at his tired eyes under his thin rimmed glasses. For the past few hours he had been working on a code for class he found rather difficult. Normally in the afternoon, he would be at hockey practice, but it was not due to start up again until after the last player had their exam, which would be today. So tomorrow it would be back on schedule of going to class and then heading to practice. But for now, he wanted to get ahead of his coding class before he was swamped with too much work. His computer screen flashed brightly for a moment to tell him his battery was low.

"Yeah, sass me about when to plug in my computer. I know," Matthew muttered as he pulled out the charger from his backpack and searched for a place to plug it in.

He was currently at the library at one of the tables with uncomfortable chairs. Finding the plug under the table, he crawled on his hands and knees in order to plug the sassy computer up and sit back in his chair. As soon as he sat back in his chair, a cold substance was placed on his neck making him squeal and jump a little.

"Wow birdie, I didn't think you would get that scared. It's just an iced coffee," Gilbert said with a grin on his face. "Here, it's yours."

"Gil?" Matthew gave a small sigh of relief glad it was just water from the cup and not some strange substance. "What do you mean mine?"

"Remember the other week I said we would meet at the coffee shop but that didn't go as planned. So when Ludwig said he would be longer and just to wait for him, I thought I would come to the library. I saw you and decided you needed coffee." Gilbert held out the coffee for Matthew to take and shrugged his shoulder. "It's got maple syrup in it. I thought you would like that."

"I do, thank you," Matthew said, taking the cup gingerly. "But why did I look like I needed coffee?"

"I saw you yawn this big." Gilbert demonstrated, earning a few glances from the people around Matthew.

Matthew shook his head before sipping on the coffee. Gilbert had been true to his word, there was maple syrup in it. Matthew pointed to the chair sitting next to him. Gilbert nodded and sat down, scooting a little closer to see the computer screen.

"Have you started this one yet?"

"Nope. I had a math exam this morning, so I thought it would be better to just hold off until tomorrow to start it." Gilbert stretched his hands and yawned. "I hate math early in the morning."

Matthew chuckled a little. "So I take it no soccer practice?"

"Nope! Not till Friday since that's when the last of the starting players has an exam. It's totally unawesome, but there's nothing I can do about it. What about hockey?"

Matthew saved his work and closed his laptop, knowing he was not going to get any work done with Gilbert nearby.

"It starts back up tomorrow. If you're really that bored you could probably come and watch if you want," Matthew said without really thinking much of the offer. There were times when Alfred watched him and gave Matthew pointers for his position. He watched Gilbert's eyes widen.

"Seriously?"

Matthew shrugged. "Coach doesn't mind. So yeah, I'm serious."

"Awesome! What time does it start?" Gilbert pulled out his phone and fiddled with it for a moment.

"Right after the class we have together," Matthew said with a small smile. He thought he was the only one who got excited about a hockey practice. "We'll probably be doing a mock match since we won't know who the starter players are thanks to certain grades."

Gilbert nodded as he punched a few more buttons on his phone before putting it away. He then continued to grin at Matthew. "That's fine. I don't know too much about hockey since it's not that big of a sport from where I come from, but it shouldn't be that hard to pick up right?"

"Nope, I can even teach you the rules sometime. Or you could go with Alfred and some of the others from the complex to watch me play in a game. They would be more than happy to explain the rules to you," Matthew said, putting away the laptop and leaned back in his seat with a sigh before checking his watch. "The next bus doesn't leave for another twenty minutes."

"Ja, ich weiβ. West should be done by then, I hope." Gilbert ran his hand through his hair. "By the way, we're still okay after all the misunderstanding ja?"

Matthew blinked at Gilbert a few times, blanking on what he meant until Matthew recalled Friday's events. Smiling, he gave a small nod.

"I said as much eh?"

Gilbert nodded.

"Good. Because otherwise this would be rather awkward," Gilbert said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"This?" Matthew asked curiously, brows knitted curiously.

"Yeah, the whole giving you coffee and now planning on going to your practice. That stuff," Gilbert looked down at the ground, a heavy blush appearing on his pale skin.

"It's fine Gil. I said we could be friends and friends hang out," Matthew said, reassuring the Prussian.

"Ja."

"Bruder?" a deep German accented voice asked behind Gilbert as Matthew saw Ludwig for the first time.

"West! I thought you were going to take forever," Gilbert said, a smirk on his face, the blush almost gone.

"It was not as bad as I had originally thought. Is this Matthew?" Ludwig asked, nodding in Matthew's direction with his head, icy blue eyes locked onto Matthew's.

"Oh right. Matthew this is West, I mean Ludwig. West, this is Matthew." Gilbert pointed at the two in turn, making Ludwig give a small smile and roll his eyes. Shaking his head, he extended a hand toward Matthew, who took it.

"Nice to meet you," Ludwig said, gripping Matthew's hand tightly, but not enough to hurt him.

"Pleasure's all mine," Matthew said politely, giving back just as much pressure.

With a huff of satisfaction, Ludwig nodded his head in approval. Gilbert cocked his head to the side to watch the interaction, unaware of the small power struggle between the two. Straightening up, Ludwig looked at his watch.

"Shall we head to the bus stop? We could get the best seats if we're the first ones on it." Ludwig said, moving his backpack on his shoulder.

"What do you think?" Gilbert asked as he turned to Matthew.

"Why not eh?" Matthew said with a smile. He rather liked Gilbert's brother with the serious attitude, very much the opposite of Alfred's usual boisterous self.

Gathering their belongings, Ludwig led the way out of the library and towards the bus stop. The sun was rather warm, giving the illusion that winter was not far off and the colder weather was still on it's way to the university. But for now, Matthew enjoyed the warmth while it lasted. When the bus pulled up after a few conversations about classes and how their mid-terms went, Gilbert quickly grabbed the seat next to Matthew. Ludwig shook his head before heading towards the back of the bus.

"You could sit with your brother if you want," Matthew said with a small chuckle.

"I know, but I see him all the time at the apartment. Besides, who knows, you might let me use your shoulder to sleep on again." Gilbert bumped Matthew's shoulder with a wink.

Matthew sat there opening and closing his mouth for a moment before punching Gilbert in the arm. "You hoser, that was one time."

"Geez, Birdie, you sure can throw a punch," Gilbert said rubbing the sore spot. "I was only kidding."

Matthew refused to talk to Gilbert the rest of the way home, but accepted the apology before the three headed to the apartment complex.

* * *

It was ten minutes before practice and Gilbert still was nowhere to be found. Matthew told the Prussian to just walk with him so that he could show Gilbert where to sit, but no. Gilbert insisted on first getting a snack and said he would be back in a few minutes. Sighing, Matthew went into the locker to get changed into his gear. The weight from the pads and skates were familiar to him, almost as if it had been too long since he had last practiced. Which it had been almost a week now.

The others had already gotten dressed and were warming up on the ice rink, except for the few stragglers. It took Matthew the full ten minutes to get dressed and out on the rink to find snow white hair sitting in the bleachers. So Gilbert had managed to make it after all.

"Go Bridie!" Gilbert said with a shout as Matthew turned red under the visor of his helmet.

The team was a little confused as to who Gilbert was referring to, but quickly gave up on it when the whistle blew to signal the start of practice. The coach was tall, and very intimidating when he started to skate on the ice, gray scarf trailing behind him. Most of the team feared Ivan Braginski because they never knew when he would lose his temper at them thanks to the child-like smile he wore. The last kid who pushed Coach Braginski over the edge wound up in the hospital. Only the new players ever tried to get one past the Russian coach.

"I hope everyone passed their exams," he said quietly as the team gathered around him. There were a few nervous glances between the players, but Matthew only waited for further instructions. "Good. Now, let's get warmed up and get a practice match going. Ah, Matvey could you come here for a moment?"

The team did not start to move at first. Matthew had never been called out before and it made him a tad nervous, but the smile Coach Braginski wore was not as scary as it could have been. Skating over, the rest of the team started their warm ups, weary.

"Yes?" Matthew asked, lifting his visor.

"That is your friend da?" Coach Braginski pointed toward Gilbert, who waved enthusiastically at the two. Matthew nodded, wanting to become invisible. "I see, then it is fine. Next time just let me know before I accidently throw them out."

"Sure thing coach," Matthew said, pulling the visor back down and went to warm up.

"Hurry up!" Coach Braginski yelled at the team as he skated towards the center.

The rest of the practice was fairly normal. Coach Braginski yelled out different calls while the mock teams tried out different plays. For Matthew, a left wing player, he was put to work trying to battle against a few of the other players when it came to the net. For a while he was put as a defenseman, but when Coach Braginski found that people seemed to find it difficult to focus on Matthew for whatever reason, it was easier to score goals with Matthew being a left wing.

Gilbert shouted praise as the game continued, but not just for Matthew. He heard a few other remarks for other players as he skated around. When the match was finished, with Matthew's team losing by only a point, Matthew noticed the team and progressively played harder. He wondered if it had anything to with Gilbert making it feel like a real match with all the shouting.

"Matvey, I have a favor to ask. Does your friend normally have the afternoons free?" Coach Braginski asked as the rest of the team did their usual cool down.

"He has soccer practice, but it doesn't start back up till Friday," Matthew said, glancing back at Gilbert who gave Matthew a thumbs up. "Why?"

"We had a better practice when he was shouting encouraging things. So I thought maybe if he came to our practice we would have better luck. But if he can't that is okay. We'll just have to figure out something else," Coach Braginski said as he skated towards one of the entrances of the rink, his usual scarf trailing behind him. "Practice is over. See you tomorrow."

Matthew made his way over to the rest of the team, who spoke about how they were more tired than usual. A few blamed it on not having practice for a while and the others just assumed it was because of the loud mouthed spectator. Matthew kept quiet about the whole ordeal and just changed into his regular clothes, checking the time. He still had twenty minutes to catch the bus the with Gilbert. Shouldering his duffel bag of gear and his hockey stick, he left the locker rooms, waving good bye to a few of the players.

"Gilbert?" Matthew called out wondering where he had run off to. A tap on his shoulder told him.

"I was pretty cool with my shouting right?" Gilbert asked, beaming at Matthew like a proud puppy.

"Yes, Coach thinks it helped the team actually believe it was a real match and try harder. He even asked if you would like to come to all our practices," Matthew said as the two started to walk out of the stadium and towards the bus stop.

"Oh? I knew it. Anywhere I go, I just make others better with my glorious presence." Matthew shook his head and shoved Gilbert a little, who feigned being hurt. "You wound my important pride Birdie. Think about your team."

"I think they'll live if you're not around Gil. Besides, you have soccer to worry about," Matthew pointed out as he shifted his bag slightly.

"True, but I could always find a few losers hanging around to do the job for me. It shouldn't be that hard to find someone to watch practice matches and shout things." Gilbert gave a small cough.

"You okay? The ice rink wasn't too cold for you was it?" Concern laced Matthew's words as Gilbert only grinned.

"Awe, you care," Gilbert said, wiping away a fake tear before cackling. "I'm fine. I think I yelled a bit too much so my voice is bothering me a bit. But I'll be fine mom."

"Call me mom again, and I'll stop caring," Matthew said with a smile. "Come on, we still have another ten minute walk and the bus should be here in about five. We don't want to miss it."

"Ja."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, here is the next part for this story. I still don't know how long this is going to be. Anyway, I'll be gone to Paris and Normandy, France for the next 10 days. I won't have a lot internet access so no updates until I return. I'll be writing while I travel so I'll just have to type up things when I get back. Ah, I did rush this a little. Normally I don't just write and post, but in this case I did to make sure I had something out before I left. If there are any mistakes please let me know!
> 
> On another note. I just have to say that I'm really rather flattered by all the attention this story is getting. I wanted to say thank you! I hope you guys continue to like the story (comments are always welcome of course). I mean so many kudos and it's just...it blows my mind! It helps to think that so many people like it and helps the frequency of updates because I feel more compelled to write. I just wanted to say thank you so much. It means the world to me.


	6. The Blind Leading The Blind

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm back from my France trip. I had loads of fun and I took a ton of pictures and stuff. The bad news, I only had time write up this chapter and nothing for anything else. I need to focus on writing a short story as my project for the trip but after that I'll be updating the fics again. But that shouldn't be too hard considering I'll be stuck on a security desk next week for three days straight with nothing to do. All I ask for is your patience!
> 
> Moving on! You guys are amazing! Thank you for all the kudos and comments! It means a lot to me and you guys are all wonderful! I hope you enjoy the new update! If there are mistakes or questions please let me know! Enjoy :D

Things slowly returned to normal for Matthew and Gilbert once mid-terms passed. The two walked to a point that was halfway between the soccer field and the ice rink before going their separate ways. Once practice was over the Matthew would watch out for Gilbert's running form as he sprinted toward the bus to catch it in time. The two mostly sat together, either in comfortable silence or chatted about different topics.

Yet, just as Matthew thought nothing was going to change in their routine, Gilbert started to act differently. Not towards Matthew, but he started steadily moving forward in the seats till he was almost at the front row of the class they shared. If that was not enough, he continued to lean closer and closer to his screen while reading assignments or coding something during their usual get together on Friday nights, for homework.

Matthew suspected the Prussian needed glasses, but whenever Gilbert caught Matthew staring at him, Gilbert quickly turned their conversation away from any possible mention of his strange behaviour. But Matthew had enough of the secrecy. He was going to bring up the subject once their computer class was over and done with. All he had to do was attempt to pay attention for the next few minutes for Professor Eduard von Bock to finish their lesson. Sadly, the room was rather warm from the humming from the thirty different desktops and laptops throughout the room. The noise was something he was familiar with, and so lulled him in a false sense of security of being at home instead of in the classroom.

The professor normally let his students call him Professor Eduard because von Bock was such a mouthful. Matthew liked the teacher well enough considering how patient the man was when it came to helping students with their work. He was understanding when students could not turn in a homework assignment right away and tended to care for his students just as he was doing now, by staring straight at Matthew. Blinking a few times, Matthew realised Professor Eduard had said something to him.

"Mr. Williams, if you would see me after class I would greatly appreciate it," Professor Eduard said not missing a beat as Matthew sunk a little lower in his chair as heat rose from his cheeks. "Class dismissed."

Matthew wished he had done a better job at looking attentive, but now he worried what would happen. Would he be let off with just a lecture, or would he get points docked? Or maybe it was about his most recent assignment which had not been his best thanks to one of the hockey practices running later than usual? An icy cold feeling crept throughout his body as his fingers started to tingle. Breathing suddenly became a little difficult. As he thought of the worst case scenario, a hand on his shoulder startled him out of his thoughts.

"Birdie, relax. He just wants to talk, remember to breathe okay? I'll wait for you right outside the classroom," Gilbert said softly before giving Matthew's shoulder a quick squeeze before heading out.

Matthew simply nodded and shut his eyes. He needed to calm down first. Taking in a deep breath and releasing it, he opened his eyes and gathered his belongings. Looking up, he found Professor Eduard doing the same while he waited for Matthew.

"You wanted to see me Professor Eduard," Matthew said quietly, cursing himself for being timid.

"Yes, I did. You seem a bit distracted recently? Are you all right?" Professor Eduard asked, shifting a stack of papers from the desk into his bag. "The past few classes you've been watching Mr. Beilschmidt and I had to wonder if something happened between the two of you."

"Oh. Umm," Matthew could feel his face turning red as heat once again. "We're just friends."

"I see. Are you concerned about his eyesight then?" The professor gave him a gentle smile as Matthew nodded. "I've talked to him about a week ago about his eyes. It seems he can't read the board very well, but he refuses to get them checked out. Perhaps you could encourage him as well."

"What difference would it make coming from me?" Matthew asked, his brow knitted in confusion as Professor Eduard chuckled.

"You have a lot to learn Mr. Williams. Off with you now before I get an angry e-mail from Mr. Braginski asking why you were late to practice."

"Yes sir," Matthew said quickly as he nodded his head and headed out the door to find Gilbert leaning against a wall. He had waited for him just as he said.

Matthew felt relieve run through his body by just seeing Gilbert leaning there. His expression was laced with worry in his crimson eyes. With his arms folded, and rigid position, Matthew wondered if it had Gilbert who was under questioning and not himself. Still, Matthew found it rather endearing that he could trust Gilbert after only knowing him for about a month now. The two had seamlessly interwoven their routines to where Matthew felt they had known each other for years.

"And?" Gilbert asked, his voice cracking only slightly to reveal his frazzled nerves. He pushed himself off the wall and walked up to Matthew, putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"He just asked why I was distracted, which is entirely your fault by the way," Matthew said with a quick glare at the unsuspecting Prussian. Gilbert could not have known that he was the cause, but Matthew wanted him to take some responsibility.

Giving an audible gasp, Gilbert cleared his throat, a smug grin playing on his lips. He placed a hand on his chest in mock wonder. "Why's that Birdie? Have you finally realised how much you wanted me?"

"No, but you need glasses or contacts at least," Matthew said, as the two started their trek towards the halfway point the two had picked out.

The path took them out of the computer science building and toward the history building on campus, which was near the library. The campus revolved around the main library and so just on the outskirts on either side of the campus were different sports facilities. Sadly, neither Gilbert's nor Matthew's sports practiced near each other, which was why Matthew was always on the lookout for Gilbert on the bus.

"I don't need glasses Birdie," Gilbert said dangerously low, almost as if he was growling.

Matthew paused in walking out the door of their building. Blinking, he turned toward Gilbert. It was the first time he had heard Gilbert use such a tone, but then again, there was still a lot neither knew about the other. But for Gilbert to get so defensive over needing something as simple as glasses was a bit uncalled for. So Matthew stared at Gilbert unmoving.

"Ah, I'm sorry. It's just the professor thought I needed them too." Gilbert rubbed the back of his neck nervously, but never looked Matthew in the eyes. Sighing, Matthew continued walking.

"Gilbert, there is nothing wrong with needing glasses you know. I wear them. For games I wear contacts, but for practice and stuff, it doesn't stop me. I even think I look a little smarter with them on too," Matthew said with a smile. "Is that what's bothering you about glasses? You think you'll look stupid or something?"

Gilbert stared at Matthew for a moment before looking at the ground again. Matthew wanted Gilbert to open up to him just as he had gotten Matthew to do the same. If they were going to be friends, it was only natural to want to understand one another in such a situation, right? Matthew wondered if perhaps he was stepping over a boundary he shouldn't have. Gilbert nodded quietly. Matthew closed the small gap between the two that formed while they were walking and patted Gilbert's back in sympathy. The soccer bag hanging from Gilbert's shoulder made it a bit difficult to bring Gilbert into a hug, otherwise Matthew would have done so.

"Shall I tell you a story?"

Gilbert's brows knitted together as his crimson eyes showed the concern, confusion, and uncertainly Gilbert felt. Matthew made sure to keep walking as he started his story, or the two would really be late for practice.

"When I was little, I didn't want to wear glasses either so I did everything I could to keep my parents from noticing. Alfred was the same way actually. But then I finally couldn't see the board clearly enough to get my assignments finished and my grades dropped. Alfred finally said something to our parents and suddenly we were both brought in to get our eyes checked. At first we both refused to wear glasses, but thanks to the lady who was there, we found frames we actually liked that complimented our faces. Back then we looked a lot alike, so the glasses helped to distinguish between us as well."

Matthew remembered the lady being kind with dark skin and long braided black hair. She told them both to be brave because it was tough growing up and she had been right with how often Alfred had gotten them in trouble as kids. Of course it did not change during their time in high school either. Matthew shuddered at the memories. He turned to see Gilbert thinking deeply, not even paying attention as he almost ran into a lamp post. Pulling him away from the post, Matthew shook his head.

"Gil, you need to be a little more attentive." Matthew sighed. "So glasses aren't that big of a deal. I'll go with you if you want. If the doctor says you don't need them then you don't. But by the looks of things, I'm sure that you just need reading glasses which means you don't need to wear them all the time."

"All right Birdie, you win. I'll go and get my eyes checked. But if I needed glasses you'll help me pick them out right?" Matthew could tell Gilbert was greatly out of his comfort zone, Matthew nodded his head.

"I won't let you down."

"Good, so see you after practice."

"Like always, Gil."

* * *

"Here we are Gil." Matthew turned off his red jeep. "This is where Al and I get our glasses and check-ups."

"It's so big," Gilbert said as he slowly climbed out of the jeep.

The building was large and very square. The large windows let in natural light and allowed customers to see inside to look at all the merchandise. It was very inviting with the bright colours behind a white logo. Leading the way, Matthew opened the door to allow Gilbert in.

"Goeiedag, welcome. How can we help you today? Oh Matthew, hello!" the receptionist said with a bright smile. Her short brown hair was pulled back with a green hair band the same colour as her dark green eyes.

"Hello Miss Emma. How are you today?" Matthew greeted with a smile.

"I'm doing wonderful. Antonio is a little bored though since it's been so slow recently. So what can I help you with today?" She sat up a little straighter seeing Gilbert looking about the stacks of glasses.

"If he's not too busy, do you think he could take a walk in? My friend Gilbert needs a check-up," Matthew said as Emma nodded her head. "He's new."

"Right, have him fill this out and I'll let Antonio know." Emma handed Matthew a clipboard before heading into another room.

"Gil, you need to fill this out," Matthew called out turning to find Gilbert goofing off with a pair of glasses and making faces in a mirror. He chuckled at the scene.

The two sat in a pair of waiting room seats as Matthew helped Gilbert fill out the paperwork. There were a few spots where Gilbert had to call Ludwig to answer a few of the questions, but once it was filled out, Matthew laid the clipboard on Emma's desk and went to sit with Gilbert again.

"Are you sure about this Mattie?" Gilbert asked as Matthew patted his arm sympathetically with a sigh.

For the past fifteen minutes, Gilbert had shifted in his seat every few seconds while Matthew had busied himself with a magazine at first. The optometry Matthew and Alfred went to usually took in walk in appointments if there was time, which was why the two were sitting in the waiting room chairs as Gilbert fidgeted. The TV in the corner of the room was quietly playing a children's show as Emma came back out of the room and picked up the phone. She started talking in Dutch to someone on the other end.

"Gilbert, just relax. It's not that scary I promise. The guy is really nice and friendly so you have nothing to fear," Matthew said patting Gilbert's hair, finding it just as soft as he had imagined. "Trust me."

"I trust you, just not whoever is going to come-"

"Beilschmidt? Gilbert Beilschmidt?" a thick Spanish accent filled the air as Matthew turned to see a tanned, chocolate brown haired man with bright green eyes that sparkled, walk in their direction. A radiant smile adorned his face. "Ah, hola Matthew. How are you doing? The glasses bothering you?"

"Nothing like that Antonio. My friend Gilbert is here for an appointment, I just came to show him this place." Matthew smiled at the Spanish man before pointing to Gilbert, who sat there paler than he normally was.

"That would make sense. So you ready amigo? It shouldn't take too long Matthew," Antonio said as helped the stunned Gilbert out of his seat and ushered him into the doctor's office.

While Gilbert got his eyes checked, Matthew decided to browse around the place a little to see if there were any new glasses since the last time he had come for a check-up. Ever since he had first gotten glasses, he kept the same style of oval shape glasses. He preferred the colour red if he could find them, but otherwise went with the simple black. Alfred had always used a more box type style, going for either red or blue glasses to make him more patriotic he had claimed when they were little. Matthew wondered if he still chose the colours for that reason, or just simply out of habit now.

As he meandered around, he found the new block type glasses which were thick rimmed with a two toned colour scheme. While they looked interesting, he found them to hinder his sight with the thick temple pieces to block where he needed to see. Putting them back, he turned toward another style. He giggled at the thought of big owlish glasses to make him look like a character from Harry Potter. It would have been interesting to try, but he moved on as he waited for Gilbert.

But after browsing around, he found himself bored. Sitting back down in the seat, he listened to Emma talk in a mixture of Dutch and English. The first time she had done this, Matthew had been curious and asked her what language it was. Now hearing the Dutch and thinking about how often Gilbert used German words, Matthew wondered if he should start incorporating French as well. He had taken French all throughout high school and a bit in college, but refrained from speaking it unless he had to. Slowly his thoughts drifted toward Gilbert and perhaps learning German to talk with him in Gilbert's native language. He wondered how hard it would be to learn German. In return he could probably teach Gilbert a few things in French.

Twenty minutes passed before Gilbert came out downtrodden with Antonio not far behind with a gentle smile. Matthew held back for the time being as Gilbert talked with Antonio a little more before getting a slip of paper. Antonio then left to go back in his office and Gilbert made his way towards Matthew.

"The verdict?" Matthew asked, already guessing the answer.

"Reading glasses," Gilbert said with clenched teeth. "I have to wear them when I read anything or I'm on the computer for long periods of time."

"At least you don't have to wear them all the time Gil. Here, let's find a good pair of frames eh?" Matthew said pointed to the wide selection of glasses. It caught Gilbert by surprise as he gawked around at the different frames once again.

"What do you think?" Gilbert asked as he started toward the oval shaped style. He picked a random pair up and put them on.

Matthew attempted not to laugh at the way the glasses were too big for his angular face. "Sorry, Gil, but those are not right for you."

"Oh? Then let's try these," Gilbert said putting the pair he had picked up back and then grabbed a new circular frame. "And now?"

"No. Your face is not made for rounder and softer styles. You need something to fit your rather angular face. Try the box like ones," Matthew said, following Gilbert.

Matthew refrained from pointing any style he thought would look nice on Gilbert. From the time he had picked out his first pair, the lady who helped him made sure they were what he wanted and not what others thought looked nice. It made the first pair of glasses easier to transition. It was important for Gilbert to pick the ones he liked and not whatever Matthew picked for him. Matthew wanted to reciprocate what he learned from the lady so many years ago by helping Gilbert pick out the pair he wanted.

"Alright," Gilbert said as he looked around for the box style. He had first picked up the strange blockish glasses Matthew had tried on, but quickly put them back when he noticed deep blue square frames and picked them up. "What about these?"

Matthew smiled approvingly. They fit much better than any of the other glasses he had tried on. Nodding, Gilbert smiled a little.

"I see you choose the Prussian blue frames. They aren't as popular, but they look lovely on you," Emma said, walking up from the reception desk.

"Prussian?" Gilbert took the glasses off and inspected them a little closer before handing them to the woman. "I'll take these!"

"Oh?"

"Sorry Miss Emma. He's a fan of Prussia," Matthew explained as Gilbert stood there, crimson eyes sparkling with a large grin.

"I'm not a fan. I am Prussian. And if wearing glasses means I get to wear the Prussian colours then I'm fine with that." Matthew laughed at how simple a solution had come out for Gilbert. "You know, you should laugh a lot more Mattie."

"Gil," Matthew shook his head as Emma took the glasses from Gilbert and started the process to get him the glasses. " If you want you can just use my notes for our computer class until your glasses come in. That way you don't have to sit in the front anymore because I think you're starting to upset the unspoken golden rule of not changing seats after the first week or so."

Gilbert snorted. "Rules are meant to be broken Mattie. Besides, moving around the seats means people are forced to actually associate with other people. Trust me that unspoken rules needs to be changed."

"If you say so," Matthew said with a hint of a smile as Emma turned toward the boys. "Mr. Gilbert, could I have your phone number to call you to let you know when the glasses come in? They should actually arrive sometime next week."

"Sure," Gilbert said as he quickly rattled off the numbers for her and quickly for the glasses.

"See you next week, tot ziens," Emma said with a smile.

"Tot ziens?" Gilbert asked as Matthew opened the door for them to leave.

"Yup, she's from Belgium. I was surprised the first time I met her too, but she's nice," Matthew said with a simple nod of his head.

"I see. Thanks for taking me Birdie. I'll make it up to you somehow," Gilbert said, a frown set on his face.

"Wear the glasses when you need it before you end up having terrible eyesight like Al and myself."

Gilbert nodded giving Matthew a quick and tight hug. Matthew stood frozen for a moment, a blush forming as he hugged Gilbert back.

"We should head back," Matthew said quickly when Gilbert released him, not looking Gilbert in the eyes.


	7. Thunderstorms Are Not Awesome

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just as a warning, someone's death is mentioned. But other than that I hope you enjoy the chapter. Thanks again for all the lovely kudos, booksmarks, and comments!

Since early in the morning, Matthew wondered if it was going to rain. The skies were muddled with grey clouds, with only the occasional sun peeking through, but as the day continued, the clouds grew darker and the wind picked up. He almost done a few pages from a report he was supposed to turn in while he was changing classes. Yet the prospect of a storm did not bother him, instead it was the strange way Gilbert was acting.

Instead of his boisterous self, Gilbert was more reserved. He kept quiet in class, and hardly sent Matthew silly texts about his day when the two weren't together. Matthew did not press the matter, figuring Gilbert would tell him in due time what was wrong. He could only hope he had not offended Gilbert by helping him get the glasses even though Gilbert had expressed how dashingly awesome he looked in the mirror when he wore them. The pair had gone to get his new glasses earlier that morning before classes. Still, Matthew worried about the sudden change. He almost texted Ludwig to see if he knew what was wrong with his brother, when he remembered Ludwig was tutoring someone today.

So when both their practices were cancelled because of the coming thunderstorm, he found himself sitting next to a fidgeting Gilbert. While the thunderstorm would not hinder hockey practice per say, there were plenty of rumours going around about how a few years ago the hockey rink had gotten struck by lightning and the power was out for days, leaving the hockey players trapped inside until someone was able to pry the automatic doors open. So when coach Braginski declared there would be no practice, Matthew had quickly gotten himself on the bus.

The two talked about their day. Thunder rumbling in the distance as the bus drove. Gilbert constantly looked out the window while they discussed various topics. At times Gilbert would forget what they were talking about, but Matthew just repeated what he said, not wanting to upset Gilbert. When they reached the apartment building, the two went their separate ways, Matthew stating he wanted to cook something for dinner before the storm settled in and perhaps watch reruns of some show. At the moment he was rather into the series Castle; Gilbert watched a few episodes, pointing out certain elements to explain to Matthew to better understand the relationship between the two main characters. Gilbert decided he would catch up on cleaning instead.

So when the first drops pattered against the window, Matthew started up the water boiler to make a steaming cup of hot chocolate and grabbed a blanket and flashlight just in case. One never knew when the power would go out. Yet just as the water boiler went out, there was a loud crack of thunder, a yelp and a loud fist slamming on his door.

"I'm coming," Matthew said as he checked to see Gilbert through the peephole, cowering in front of the door. "Gil?"

Once the door opened, Gilbert barged through the door and saw the blanket on the couch. He dove straight for crocheted blanket and huddled under it. Matthew closed the door gently behind him and looked at the shivering bundle on the couch. Shaking his head, he headed into the kitchen to make two cups of hot chocolate. Finished, he put them on the living room table and gently patted Gilbert's back.

"Are you afraid of the thunder or lighting?" Matthew asked quietly as the pitter patter of the rain filled the apartment with the occasional flash of lightning.

"B-both." Gilbert's voice was muffled by the blanket, but peaked out when Matthew rubbed circles on his back. His usual snow white hair ruffled in places where the blanket had rubbed against it. Matthew thought he looked rather adorable, but the fear in his crimson eyes made Matthew nod his head and continue the soothing motions. Why he had suddenly thought the Prussian was adorable was beyond him, but he needed to comfort his best friend first.

"Is your brother not home?"

Gilbert shook his head, the blanket falling to his shoulders.

"He's stuck on campus with Feliciano."

"All right. Well you can stay here as long as you want. I made some hot chocolate," Matthew said as he picked up one of the mugs to show Gilbert. "It should have cooled enough to sip."

"Thanks Mattie," Gilbert said as he cuddled with the blanket and took the hot chocolate.

Matthew just smiled and took up the other cup to drink. "Share the blanket. Or better yet, I have an idea. I'll be right back."

With a broad grin, Matthew dashed to his bedroom to grab the blankets and pillows from his bed. He then proceeded to do the same with Alfred's and dumped them on the couch. Prompting Gilbert to move, he slowly moved the furniture around until he nodded to himself with approval. He threw pillows and blankets on the floor making sure they were pressed up against the couches and the wall facing away from the window. A few blankets were draped over the two couches and Matthew added his stuffed polar bear into the mix for a complete blanket and pillow fortress.

It had been years since he had last made one. It had been with Alfred when he was afraid of thunderstorms as a kid. Until his mother told him it was only angels bowling up I the heavens. To this day Matthew wondered if Alfred had gotten over his fear because of that statement. Honestly, he wondered why people said that, but if it helped he guessed that was all that mattered. Sadly, he was sure that telling Gilbert this story would not help in the least bit.

"There, that should just about do it. What do you think Gil?" Matthew turned to see Gilbert stare at the fortress.

Gilbert blinked a few times; Matthew was sure the other had no idea what to make of the fort. Another crack of lightning came down, making the Prussian scrambling to his feet and dive into the fortress. His mug of hot chocolate was sitting on the table, having finished it while Matthew built the fort.

"Thanks Mattie," Gilbert said as Matthew joined him, holding the bear close to him.

"Not a problem. And see, the blankets block out most of the light, so all we have to do now is close the fort enough to where we don't see the lightening. All that's left to worry about is the thunder." Matthew sat there pondering what he could do to help with that. Normally he would have grabbed headphones, but sadly he knew none of the pairs he had would suffice in drowning out the sounds.

"Mattie, its fine. I'll be okay. It's mostly the lightening, really." Gilbert nestled into the blankets, a blush dusting his cheeks as Matthew gave a small smile and a nod.

"If you say so." Matthew got comfortable in the fort himself.

When another crack of thunder boomed overhead, Matthew felt Gilbert grasp his hand. Turning to face Gilbert, he noticed the Prussian had his eyes shut tight. Matthew gave a reassuring squeeze but did not let go.

"Do you want to tell me why you're so afraid of thunderstorms?" Matthew asked, hoping he was not pressing any buttons with Gilbert's already frayed nerves. The Prussian said nothing for a long time, making Matthew wonder if he should change the subject when suddenly in a very small voice he began his story.

"Back in Germany, when I was little and before Ludwig came along, there was a kid who used to live on our street. I never knew his name, but we played together at times. He looked a lot like Ludwig now that I think about it. I played with a lot of kids I never knew their names, but still. I wish I knew his, maybe then it wouldn't be so bad. I used to show them how to climb trees, and chase after the birds. Things like that."

Matthew could not catch Gilbert's eyes, but the Prussian scooted closer, letting their intertwined hands rest on his chest like some life line. Matthew did not pull away, but only softly carded his free hand through Gilbert's hair to give the other comfort.

"One day it started to rain. We were all climbing in the trees in the patch of woods right outside our neighbourhood. Most of our parents knew we were there so really no one was too worried about us since we knew deter than to stay out in the rain. But someone was stuck in the trees, too terrified to get back down. The kid decided he was going to climb up and get him down. Honestly he was only a few inches taller than the one stuck in the tree. I don't know what he was thinking. But before I could stop him, he was already halfway up the tree. Thankfully he reached the other kid in time and even started bringing him back."

Gilbert squeezed Matthew's hand a little tighter as his eyes screwed shut at the memory.

"There was a bolt of lightning and then thunder. I felt the boy who was stuck in the tree land on me, having been thrown off of the kid who was climbing. When I made sure he was okay, I turned to the one still in the tree. He was a little shaken up, but otherwise okay. So I told him to jump and I would catch him. He trusted me and we got him down. But when we were heading home, I had both of them in my hands. There was another flash of lightning that hit the tree both had been in only moments before. He saved the other kids life. I was the oldest. Groβvater said it wasn't my fault when the tree started falling and hit the kid who looked like West. It was terrible. We moved shortly after that and then Ludwig came along. It's one of the reasons why I dote on him so much. If something like that were ever to happen to him, I don't know what I'd do."

Towards the end, Gilbert's voice grew fainter as he spoke, barely whispering the words at the end.

"I'm so sorry Gilbert," Matthew said as he felt tears form in his eyes. "It must have been terrifying to experience all of that when you were just a kid."

"Ja, I suppose it was. Whenever there's a storm now, West usually texts me to tell me, and he doesn't go out in it," Gilbert said as he sighed. Matthew could feel the stress slowly leave the Prussian until the next wave of thunder filled the room.

"But you know it wasn't your fault right?" Matthew said as he carefully eyed Gilbert.

"I know, but it doesn't change the fact that I could have done something. I could have pushed him out of the way, I could have saved him. Instead, I was rooted at the spot with the falling tree." Gilbert took down at their clasped hands, his brows coming together in anger.

"Gil, you need to let it go. Harbouring that kind of pain is not good. You were just a little kid. No one is mad that you couldn't do any-"

"His family was mad I bet. Why couldn't someone save their kid?" Gilbert said as he sighed. "Tut mir leid."

"Gil," Matthew said before wrapping his free arm awkwardly around the Prussian to give him a hug. "You don't have to be sorry."

The two stayed safe in their little fort, talking about mundane life to try and keep Gilbert from thinking about the storm or the little boy. At some point the two had fallen asleep in the fort, only to be woken up when Alfred stepped in soaking wet.

"Finally," Alfred said as he spotted the fort. "Mattie?"

"Hey Al. Want to join us?" Matthew asked as he tossed a pillow at the still sopping wet American.

"Let me dry off and change first. But you'll need to make it a little bigger. I'll bring the other blanket out. Who's with you?" Alfred asked as he tossed his bag by the door and stepped out of his shoes.

"Gil. We were working on homework when the storm hit." Matthew said as Gilbert poked his head out to grin at Alfred uneasily and wave.

"Cool, the storm's pretty much over. Want to just spend the night and play video games Gil?" Alfred headed towards him as he let Gilbert maul over the idea. Matthew shook his head with a chuckle.

"Should have known," Matthew muttered as he shook his head. Gilbert looked at him, an eyebrow lifted in a question. "I'll tell you another day Gil. So you want to stay?"

"Sure, let me just text West then," Gil said as he pulled out his phone.

"Invite him over too! I already told Kiku he's welcome to as well. We'll just make it a big movie and video game night. I know Kiku's bringing some snacks," Alfred said rather loudly from his bedroom as he changed.

"Awesome! I'll tell West to bring some drinks, soda of course," Gilbert said with a grin.

Matthew shook his head as he stretched while standing. "Guess the fort is out of the question then."

"What? Mattie!" Alfred shouted as he appeared at his door. His face was arranged with the biggest puppy dog eyes he had yet to see on the American.

"I can't have everyone under the few blankets we have. If want a fort, they'll need to bring some blankets and pillows too. It's not that I don't want to." Matthew lifted his hands up in defeat.

"No problem!" Gilbert said as he suddenly started tapping away furiously at the keyboard.

Within the span of two hours, a good portion of the apartment complex stayed in Alfred's and Matthew's apartment in the makeshift fort. The payment for entry was either a snack, drink, pillow, or blanket. While it started with movies, by the end of the night those still awake played video games until well into the dawn. Matthew had fallen asleep on Gilbert's shoulder halfway through a video game towards four in the morning while Gilbert and Alfred continued to shoot at zombies.


	8. Is It Simple?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for all the kudos, bookmarks, and subscriptions! I'm rather glad you all are enjoying the story. 
> 
> I know I've written mostly fluff for these two for the chapters, but I suppose it's time to start getting into the heart of the matter. So, he'll be talking about sexual orientation. I've done a bit of research and have friends who are all different, but if I've managed to screw something up please let me know and I'll fix it. Other than that enjoy it.
> 
> On another note, I'm looking for a beta-reader. If anyone wants to help please contact me through a comment or even through tumblr (same as my username), it would be greatly appreciated!

"So Mattie, what's up with you and Gil?" Alfred asked as the two cleaned up the apartment from the night before.

While the party had been fun, it had been a rather dumb idea to actually spontaneously have it in the middle of the week. Matthew, who was woken up by Kiku, had to get everyone else awake to get ready for work or school depending on who they were. No one had particularly taken a liking to being kicked out, but it was hard to argue with a Canadian who threatened anyone with their hockey stick if they didn't get their arses moving. While they left, everyone eyed the hockey stick which leaned against the wall by the door while Matthew grumbled about it being too early with a cup of coffee in his hand. But now Alfred and Matthew were stuck with the clean-up. Matthew just hoped that everyone had been awake enough to grab their pillows and blankets before leaving, otherwise there would be a lot of knocking on doors or texting to make sure everyone got their stuff back.

"What do you mean Al?" Matthew asked, as he folded another blanket that belonged to Alfred. He had already found Gilbert's blanket mixed in the fray. Having already texted the Prussian about it, Matthew stuck it in the pile that belonged to him.

"I mean, are you two just best friends? Or is there something going on. I mean if you're not sure that's okay too." Alfred shot up his hands for a moment in surrender as if still fearing that Matthew would snap at him.

"It's too early for this Al. It's not even nine yet and you're asking me what my sexual orientation is," Matthew said with a sigh as Alfred flopped graciously onto the just moved couch with a whine.

"But Mattie, I want to know what's going on between you two. You guys are joined at the hips." He gave Matthew the puppy dog eyes. Honestly, if Matthew had not known him for years he would have been swayed by the big round eyes.

"Al, help clean up." Matthew scolded as he moved the recliner back to where it needed to be. Alfred only whined louder until Matthew sighed and sat on the recliner. "Fine, what do you want to know specifically?"

"So are you straight or not?" Alfred asked as he sat up. Matthew could have sworn if Alfred was a dog his tail would be waving and sticking straight up.

Mathew leaned back in the recliner and took a moment to think about his answer. If Alfred had asked him a few weeks ago, yes he would have said he was straight, but now, he was a bit hesitant. Especially when he remembered thinking Gilbert to have been adorable just yesterday. The hesitation must have allowed Alfred to make up his own decision as he sat there grinning from ear to ear.

"I knew it! So are you guys dating then? I swear if he does anything to hurt you, I'll kick his ass!" Alfred said, pounding his fist into his open palm for emphasis.

"Al! It's not like that. Look, I don't know what it is exactly. I just like hanging out with him and I know he has feelings for me. But I just want to be friends. Besides can't friends find other friends cute?" Matthew asked, as if desperately trying to find some other truth as to why he was suddenly feeling so worried about his sexuality.

"Oh Mattie, when it comes to girls, probably. But when it comes to guys, no way. You gotta think of friends as manly, and stuff like that. Once you think they're cute or adorable, it's all over," Alfred said with a boisterous laugh. Matthew groaned and put his head in his hands.

"I should never have asked you." His voice was muffled through his hands.

"Haha, come on Mattie, it's not that bad. It's not like you'll be kicked out of the house or anything. Look at me, the family accepted me for being bi. Sides, you've only been in one relationship if you want to call it that. Why not give dating Gilbert a try. Who knows, you might end up deciding he's just not the one, but you might find out that you're not into girls like you originally thought."

Matthew looked up at Alfred with horror. Had Alfred just given him advice about dating and figuring out what, or rather who he liked? Shaking his head, Matthew muttered something about the world finally coming to an end before both he and Alfred burst into laughter.

"But seriously Mattie, maybe you should go and talk with Arthur and Francis. They're usually really good at helping people with this kinda stuff. I mean I talked with Francis for a while when I wasn't sure. Now I'm totally okay with who I am," Alfred said with a smile as he threw one of the pillows at Matthew who was hit square in the face.

"Right, I think I'll talk to them later tonight when they're both not working." Matthew threw two pillows at Alfred, one of which he dodged. "Now, let's get finished cleaning up and head to class. I'm going to die at practice today."

* * *

Matthew took a deep breath as he found himself outside of Arthur and Francis's apartment door. Alfred had already texted Arthur to let him know that Matthew was coming, but still it was a bit awkward to suddenly have a conversation with two guys he looked up to about sexuality. But he needed to get some answers or at least something to think about. He finally knocked quietly on the door.

"Ah, Mathieu, welcome. Please come in. I already put on the coffee and Arthur brought out some scones," Francis said as he opened the door wide to allow the Canadian in.

"Umm, thanks," Matthew said hesitant as he stepped in and headed to the familiar couch.

"Ah, there you are lad. I was afraid Alfred was just pulling our legs or something." Arthur sat comfortably in the reclining chair, a blanket draped over his legs and a book in his hands. A dainty tea cup sat on the table within reach. Arthur took off his reading glasses and laid them on the book, giving Matthew his full attention. "So what brings you here today?"

"Can I ask you guys something rather personal?" Matthew sat on the couch opposite of Arthur as Francis leaned against the reclining chair with a glass of wine.

"Of course mon cher, what is it?"

"Umm, how do you- that is to say. How do you figure out your sexuality?" Matthew said, rushing the last few words. He knew he was already red in the face, but what could he do about it. He wanted answers and the only way to get them would be to ask the weird and hard questions.

Francis sputtered his wine a bit, dripping some of it onto Arthur, who blinked at first before giving Francis a punch in the side for spilling the wine.

"You cheesy monkey! This was made by me mum! You better get the wine out of the blanket," Arthur said with a glare.

"You black sheep of Europe. It's not my fault mon cher suddenly asked such a question. I was in shock," Francis said as he set his wine glass down and took the blanket in his hands delicately. "I shall be able to remove it. But first I think we had best answer Mathieu's question non?"

"Yes, I agree...for once," Arthur said as they both turned their attention back to Matthew who had buried his face in his hands. The tips of his ears were pink from embarrassment along with having caused such a ruckus for both Arthur and Francis.

"Y-You don't have to answer it. I think I'll just-"

"Non, non. You should stay and listen to what we have to say," Francis said with a gentle smile. "What you are asking is about amour, so of course we're going to help you."

Matthew nodded his head, still not looking either of them in the eyes.

"Well, I knew I was pretty much gay the moment I was in high school. Of course, it wasn't my fault I was delirious from the toxins I inhaled and otherwise, to believe that I was ever in love with this frog," Arthur said as he pointed to Francis, making Matthew stare with big owlish eyes.

"You two dated? Wait, so you've known each other how long?"

"Oui, we dated for about a year and we've known each other just about as long as Arthur has known Gilbert. You see, we were the trouble makers in our school." Arthur frowned, crossing his arms as Francis hugged him awkwardly.

"Right. Like I said, I was bleeding mad to even think about it. Anyway, after that I tried a relationship with a woman here or there, but it never worked out, I ended up going back to men more often than not. So I figured I would accept it. Nothing else to it I suppose. Obviously the family didn't take it none too kindly, but what could I do? My other brother turned out to be gay as well. My parents blamed me for putting those sorts of thoughts into his head, but I was not around enough for that sort of thing. So in the end when I finally moved here to America to teach proper English, I learned it was rather acceptable in some places," Arthur said as he looked at Francis.

"And yet you still haven't found anyone to finally settle down with," Francis pointed out with a smirk.

"As if you have, you damned frog. Now hurry up and answer the question," Arthur said as he took up his tea cup sipping at the still steaming tea.

"Oui. Unlike our Arthur, I am pansexual. So as long as there is love and sexual attraction I don't necessarily mind who you are. I found this out when I went away to France for a few years to finish up my college work after all my high school shenanigans with Arthur and Gilbert. I met a few people and I discovered we were in the same mind set. Honestly, I had no idea what to call myself until I found this group. The rest is history and before you say anything about my settling down Arthur, I'll have you know I'm in a relationship with a wonderful woman."

Matthew chuckled at the two, wondering if they really spent all their time arguing with each other, or if they did it because they were more like family? Either way, Matthew was glad he had come to ask them about it, even if he still didn't have an answer for himself just yet, the way he saw it, he still had time to decide knowing that Francis had not found out until his college years.

"Thanks," Matthew said as the two unrelenting to stop he bicker, only pausing to nod their heads towards Matthew before continuing to verbally attack one another.

Slipping out of the chair, Matthew took two scones and headed towards the door. He knew when the two fought like this they would not notice him any longer and they could go on for hours if they wanted. So Matthew went back to his own apartment to see Alfred sitting in one of the bar stools muddling through some physics homework.

"Brought back a few scones," Matthew said as he closed the door and locked it.

"You mean cardboard?" Alfred absently said as he scratched out another answer and continued doing math in his head.

"You know, if you want to get anywhere with Arthur, you're going to have to put up with his cooking," Matthew said as he put one of the scones in front of Alfred, who took it absentmindedly and bite into it. Only after chewing for a moment did he stare at the pastry as if it offended him and put it back on the counter.

"Yeah, well I don't see you eating it," Alfred said as he watched Matthew opened the fridge to whip out butter and jam.

"All you need to do is add a bit of flavour Al. Or maybe you should help him cook and teach him not to leave things in the oven for too long eh?" Matthew cut open the scone, revealing light and fluffy pastry on the inside, which he spread the butter and jam on. He then handed half of it to Alfred who nibbled at it while Matthew ate the other half.

"Maybe you're right."

"I'm always right," Matthew said with a grin as he left the kitchen to go lay in his bed to think.

The one conclusion he found acceptable at the moment was he still had plenty of time to figure out what his sexuality was. Realising in this day and age it was okay to be different and not having a clue took a weight of his shoulder, but he wanted to know. More than anything he wanted an answer that Gilbert had suddenly brought up to him. What was his sexuality? The only problem he had with the notion of even considering dating Gilbert at the moment besides having believed himself to be straight, was that he was not quite sure if he was really in love with his best friend, and if he wanted to even risk their friendship to find out.

Checking his phone, Matthew found a message from Gilbert who had thanked him for what he did the night before and told him he would receive a large cake for his birthday. Texting him back, Matthew told him he would have to hold Gilbert to that and asked if he even knew his birthday. And so the easy relationship the two had established was a safe zone for both of them for the time being; Matthew was just not sure if he wanted to push the boundaries just yet to test the waters. Perhaps a good night's sleep would help him think a little.


	9. Cliche Gilbert

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait. My computer's battery charger finally died after hanging on by a small thread of wire for almost a year. I had some trouble getting the money for a new one until just recently. So, this is a bit of a set-up chapter, so sorry for that. Classes start for me tomorrow so I'll be slow as usual.
> 
> As always thank you guys for the kudos and the comments! They are always appreciated.

Over the next few weeks, Matthew became more aware of Gilbert, even if the Prussian had not changed. While their classes hardly allowed them to ride together in the mornings, their practice remedied that problem during the afternoon. Gilbert made sure to run for the bus after his practice; most days he still wore his soccer uniform and was out of breath by the time he made it. The days when they had computer programming together, they spent the night coding to help with the errors. It was easier with two sets of eyes rather than one. On those days, Alfred offered to cook. After the first week it just became routine. Although once Ludwig caught wind of this, he had invited Alfred and Matthew over for dinner with the excuse of repaying them for keeping Gilbert out of trouble. The two were allowed to have a beer if they wanted considering they weren't driving. Alfred tried it but ended up having to mix it with soda at one point to keep from getting too tipsy; a trick he learned from Ludwig. Matthew politely refused but did enjoy the sausage. The four had arranged to alternate weeks of who was cooking on those nights.

Thinking back, Matthew could hardly believe how much his world had changed from the moment he let Gilbert rest his head on his shoulder. Gilbert had turned his world upside down by giving him a best friend and several more friends to boot. Alfred had been one of his only friends since growing up and honestly he felt like he was holding Alfred back when it came to Alfred's extroverted ways. Yet, when he met Gilbert, Matthew was slowly brought out of his shell and making new friends. Just the day before, Ludwig sat with him on one of the campus benches and shared his lunch with Feliciano who happily let Matthew join in their conversations.

So while he had grown used to Gilbert being around, it was rather quiet on the bus that afternoon. Gilbert had missed it and while Matthew had kept an eye out for the Prussian, there was no sign of him running after the bus. As Matthew looked around, it felt oddly quiet and he missed the weird cackle that was Gilbert's laugh and his crimson eyes shining bright with a new idea or some prank he had pulled off. But mostly, Matthew missed Gilbert. Pulling out his phone, Matthew texted Gilbert asking him where he was, but got no response. Feeling slightly rejected and envious of the people talking around him, Matthew opted for watching the scenery blur past him in shades of green with the occasional yellow and red from the flowers.

* * *

He wasn't sure when, but he found himself opening his eyes when then cobblestone road bumped his head a few too many times against the window as they pulled up in front of the parking garage, Matthew noticed a familiar flash of white. Gilbert was leaning against a tree waiting. He wore a pair of aviator sunglasses that made Matthew want to giggle, along with casual clothing instead of a soccer uniform. A leather jacket and what appeared to be skinny jeans with converse. The setting sun glinted off something around Gilbert's neck. As the passengers filed out of the bus, Matthew was curious as to what the hell was going on.

"Gil? What are you doing here?" Matthew asked, trying to hide his giggles behind his hand as Gilbert pulled the sunglasses down to take in Matthew's body.

"I'm here to pick you up Birdie. A certain roommate of yours asked me to because he couldn't make it." Gilbert took off the sunglasses and wiggled his eyebrows a moment before the two of them burst into laughter. Once he regained his breath Gilbert continued. "But seriously, I didn't have practice because of the match tomorrow and Stars and Stripes couldn't make it. So I thought I'd come to pick you up. On the way home we can stop by to get the pizza I ordered too."

"Wait, a match?" Matthew asked, suddenly realising it was Friday. "And did you just call Al Stars and Stripes?"

"Yup. It's his new nickname." Gilbert cackled for a moment. "He rushed over to my apartment in nothing but his American flag boxers. I still don't know what was going on, but he was sure in a rush. Anyway, you wanna come and watch?"

"Only in his boxers? I'll text him a little later then. Hmm, I'll have to clear up my schedule, but I think I can make it." Matthew was just teasing him at this point, Gilbert paused in grabbing his keys with his mouth agape.

"Are you serious? You have to clear up your schedule? What do you do without me?" His tone was mocking as he smirked letting Matthew know he was only messing around.

"Yes, that's right. I have a social life outside of you." Matthew pushed Gilbert playfully as the two headed towards the parking garage. "So where did you park?"

"The fourth floor. Sorry, nothing else was open."

Matthew shook his head. He knew all about trying to find a parking spot on the first or second floor. After two years of commuting, Matthew had just started going up to the fourth floor regardless because it was generally more open and meant he could possibly save his car from any damage. The two headed towards the walkway.

"It's fine. Let's take the elevator though, this hockey gear gets pretty heavy after a while." Matthew lifted one of his hands holding onto a duffle bag with his hockey gear while the other hand held onto his hockey stick.

"I'll take it." Gilbert slung it over his back with ease before opening the door that led to the elevator. "Why do you have so much stuff anyway? Don't they have lockers to stick all of this stuff in?"

"They do, but I prefer to take my stuff home since it's all my personal gear. I don't want anyone to steal it eh? That happened to me during my freshman year." Matthew had been glad the stolen gear was older, but still, it had been rather expensive to replace it all. It took him a full year of saving and asking for certain items on his birthday and Christmas to get everything back.

"What? Who would want to steal gear?" Gilbert lifted the sunglasses into his hair as his brow furrowed at the thought. He pushed the button for the elevator to slowly make its way back down to the first level.

"Don't know. We never did find out. Al always said it was probably just some crazed fan girl or something to do with dares from rushing, but I don't know. Either way I got a new hockey stick out of it." Matthew lifted the hockey stick in his hands. "I had my eyes on this one for a while before I bought it. I mean back then I still had a backup and the one I used most days so what was having a third hockey stick? It's like your collection of soccer balls in a way."

"Hey, some of those are signed by really awesome players ja?" Gilbert smirked proudly. "But I'm glad you got better stuff now. We wouldn't want you to get hurt playing."

"No worries Gil. Hockey players are tough and most of us don't pretend to get hurt either." Matthew knew the comment was sly considering most of the penalties he saw on the last soccer game he and Gilbert watched over the weekend were the result of players dramatizing the injuries. The elevator dinged allowing the two boys on.

"Can you hold the door?"

Matthew held out his hand for the doors to open back up as Arthur came panting in. With Arthur safe in the elevator, the doors closed softly.

"Arthur?"

"Artie?"

"Yes, yes. I got off work early today. I just didn't feel like walking up those god forsaken stairs." Arthur regained his normal breathing and straighten up. "You had best press a button Matthew."

"Oh, right." Matthew quickly pressed the fourth floor button and turned to look at Arthur who nodded. The elevator was suddenly filled the smell of something sweet he could not put a finger on. "So how did you end up getting out early?"

"Well, normally during this time I actually take a class instead of teaching one. It was cancelled last minute when the teacher fell ill." Arthur explained, a twinge of pink on his face. He brushed his hands together as if attempting to get something off of them.

"Artie, what class is it?" Gilbert asked ruthlessly as he adjusted Matthew's gear on his back.

"None of your business." Arthur glared at Gilbert which startled the Prussian a little.

Matthew gave Gilbert a questioning look which turned into a warning as Gilbert opened his mouth. Matthew shook his head to stop Gilbert. The last thing either of them needed was for Arthur to get angry. The poor guy had enough trouble with Alfred hanging around him all the time. Gilbert shrugged and waited for the door to open.

"Well, whatever. Hey, I'm grabbing pizza with Birdie. Want me to grab you some too and bring it over? I heard Francis won't be home until really late." Gilbert offered as the elevator opened up their doors to the fourth floor.

"Is that so?" Arthur pulled out his phone and nodded. "Normally I would say no, but I'll take you up on the offer. Your place?"

"Ja. We'll be there in about twenty minutes or so depending on how long the pizza takes. Antonio, Kiku, Feliciano, and Romano will be there too." Gilbert dug out his keys to his car as Arthur nodded heading in the opposite direction.

"See you then...And Gilbert?" Arthur turned a little sheepishly to Gilbert.

"Ja?"

"Sorry. I shouldn't have been so short with you. But if you tell a soul about this I swear I won't hesitate to curse you." Arthur nodded his head and headed to his car as if that settled the matter, even if Matthew was suppressing giggles at the dumbfounded look on Gilbert's face.

Matthew could tell Gilbert was brimming with questions with the way he hurried over to his car to open up the trunk. Matthew put all his gear and book bag in the trunk before settling in the passenger's seat. Gilbert practically ran to the driver's side. The moment the doors were shut, he turned to Matthew.

"Spill, what do you know?"

"There was sort of stain on his pants, oil I'm guessing with the way he kept trying to brush off his hands. I'm pretty sure he's taking some sort of cooking class in general." Matthew giggled at the wide eyed Prussian.

"You mean to tell me...he's learning to cook?" Gilbert looked about him as if Arthur was going to come out of nowhere before he burst out laughing. "You have got to be kidding. He always said he could cook and he was fine with what he made. How the hell did I manage to miss it?"

"Oh? Then I wonder why the sudden change and you missed it because you're not wearing your glasses Gil."

Gilbert muttered dark things about his glasses as he cranked the car on. German music suddenly blared from the speakers before Gilbert could turn it down fast enough. He apologized as he rolled down the windows saying the air conditioner was on the fritz again. He then carefully pulled out of the parking spot to head out of the garage. It was hard not to laugh when they saw Arthur in front of them.

"So you don't think Artie made the teacher suddenly ill with his cooking do you? He was pretty red in the face when he said that." Gilbert Paid attention to the traffic as he pulled out of the parking garage.

"I doubt he's that terrible Gil. Besides, you're best friends with him, so you should know better than I do." Matthew raised a brow with amusement.

"Sure, but I heard from Al that you actually eat his food." Gilbert continued to zip through some of the lighter traffic on the road.

"Of course because I'm polite. But like I told Alfred, you just have to get around the burned parts and you'll be fine. The scones are actually really good once you cut them open and put a bit of jam or honey on them." Matthew swept some of his hair behind his ear as the wind whipped past him, making his eyes water despite the glasses he wore.

"I'll have to try that next time. But I think I know who he's trying to impress." Gilbert passed another car. "Think about it for a moment."

Matthew nodded his head. He pulled up his legs to hug them as he leaned his head on the window. He was tired from the nap, yet it was hard to concentrate one Arthur's problem of who to impress, or even Alfred's problem of forgetting something important it seemed. All he could think about was the return to normalcy Matthew and Gilbert had.

Sitting in the car and being near each other was like having the bright sun back in the sky to drive away the clouds. It was strange to think of Gilbert in this fashion, but the time the two were separated had Matthew thinking harder about their relationship and what it meant for him. Perhaps there was something more between them than just the usual close friendship.

"Birdie?" Gilbert waved a hand in front of Matthew's face, startling him out of his thoughts. "You okay? We're here."

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking." Matthew said with a smile, hoping his cheeks were not as red as he thought they were. Looking down at his nose, he saw the red from his blush.

"Oh? Did you think too hard about who Arthur likes?" Gilbert chuckled as he slowly climbed out of the car, the scent of fresh pizza floated in making Matthew's stomach growl.

"Sorry, no." Matthew tried to smile, but Gilbert didn't look convinced as Matthew climbed out the car.

"So what were you thinking about then?"

Matthew stayed quiet. He didn't want to tell Gilbert just yet about his quiet musing until he was a little more confident in his feelings and what he wanted. Still, he had to find some way of diverting Gilbert's attention.

"Just about your game, and the one I have a next week." Anything to take their conversation far away from relationships and anything related to that.

"Oh? Well I'm sure you'll do great birdie. Just relax." Gilbert gave him a thumbs up and a wink as he headed into the pizzeria. "Yo, Toni, I came to pick up the order."

"Si. It's all ready for you. Oh, hola." The man behind the counter smiled brightly at Matthew who looked around the decorations.

"H-Hello." Matthew quickly jogged to Gilbert's side, a little nervous.

"Mattie, this is Antonio, he makes some of the best tomato sauce ever. So the pizza here is always top notch, especially when Romano and Feliciano are in the kitchen." Gilbert held two four boxes of pizza, handing two over to Matthew who took them gingerly.

"Wait, Feliciano has a job?" Matthew blinked, confused at how the Italian seemed so laid back the last time they spoke together.

"Si. Their grandfather owns the restaurant and so they help out every once in a while. But he makes sure they both get their school work finished. I heard Romano is thinking of taking over the business officially one day. Feliciano might do the same, but the way he day dreams perhaps he would do better sticking to painting and cooking at home." Antonio and Gilbert laughed as if they had known each other for ages, which was probably the case since Gilbert had used a nickname for Antonio. "Romano and I will be over as soon as my shift ends. See you then mi amigo."

Feeling slightly out of the conversation, Matthew stayed quiet and simply nodded when Antonio said he would be there later. Suddenly he was reminded of that rift again. Gilbert had other friends around him, and while Matthew was certainly making new ones with Gilbert's help, he still relied heavily on Gilbert and Alfred. He felt sick to his stomach and couldn't understand why. The need to get away and back to the privacy of the car with just Gilbert and himself was so strong, Matthew had to will himself to slow down.

"Are you sure you're alright Birdie?" Gilbert asked as they exited the restaurant and headed back to the car.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Matthew sighed. Gilbert knew how to read him like an open book. He knew he should have told Gilbert about his jealousy and talked to him about everything else too, but he just couldn't find the right words to say out loud. The more he tried to play the conversation over and over in his head, the dumber it seemed to Matthew. How could he be so jealous of a friend? It wasn't as if Gilbert had ignored him or otherwise made Matthew feel unwelcome. Neither had Antonio for that matter. Feeling self-loathing settle in, he settled for holding the pizza boxes quietly and looking out the window, oblivious to the worried glances coming from Gilbert.


	10. Jealousy Is In Everyone

When the two had gotten back to the apartments, Gilbert had taken the pizza from Matthew to let him drag his gear up to his own apartment. The two were silent as they ascended in the elevator. Gilbert got off on his floor, leaving Matthew alone in the elevator.

"Sorry, Gil," Matthew mumbled after the elevator doors closed. As the elevator came up to his floor, he wondered if he should even go to the party in the end. He felt tired, mentally exhausted, and rather sick of thinking. Alfred was nowhere in sight, but a small scrap of paper greeted him when he slowly trudged to his door. The note stated Alfred had to go and run an errand with a friend he had forgotten about. Something about helping them move out or something. Honestly, Matthew could careless as he opened the door, letting his gear slide off his shoulders to lay on the ground randomly. He would pick them up later, he mused as he let himself plant face down on his bed.

The duvet felt nice, but suffocating, so he turned his face to see Kuma. His stuffed bear had seen a lot through the years. When he was younger there was no place Kuma had not gone with him. When they entered middle school, Alfred had protected Kuma from all the bullies, but told Matthew to leave the bear at home after one fight ended with both boys having bloody noses. Their parents had explained when others were different, bullies tended to pick on them and so it was for the best if Kuma stayed at home. Matthew had grown up thinking he had to hide himself from the rest of the world because he was quiet and soft spoken.

Sitting next to Kuma was a small stuffed bird, Gilbird, as Gilbert declared when he showed up one afternoon with the toy. Matthew loved the bird with every fiber of his being, even more so when he learned Gilbert had made the stuffed animal himself. Propping himself up on the bed, he felt the soft fabric Gilbird was made out of.

"Guess I should go. Maybe I'll feel better if I do." Matthew put the bird back in its place before forcing himself off the bed to head back down after changing into his usual red hoodie and fixed up his hair. "Wish me luck."

The party was exactly as Matthew had imagined it, except Gilbert had left Matthew on his own since the start of it. Fear gripped at Matthew, wondering if he had done something wrong, but couldn't voice out his concerns thanks to the other people in the room. Although, Matthew wondered if he would have said anything in the first place. Having a friend like Gilbert was new, and it was different than the relationship he shared with Alfred. Not wanting to mess it up on some dumb, strange, feelings he had, Matthew needed to figure out what his next step would be.

The music was soft, but gave the atmosphere a more relaxed environment for most of the other guests. Arthur came, just as promised. A beer in one hand and an almost finished slice of pizza in the other as he leaned against the wall, glaring at anyone who dared get close to him. Matthew figured he was still upset about his cooking class being revealed, but Arthur had nothing to fear from Matthew opening his mouth. One thing Matthew was rather good at, it was to keep a secret and any observations he made to himself. Still, with Feliciano hanging on Ludwig's side as he and Antonio got into an arm wrestling match, Matthew couldn't help but feel slightly like an outsider. As if the last few months of having Gilbert as a friend had never happened and he was dragged to a social event he would rather not have gone to because he was invisible to everyone around him.

"Are you alright there lad?" Arthur asked, having walked up to Matthew while he was lost in his thoughts.

"Eh? Oh, Arthur." Matthew gave a small sigh. He ran a hand through his hair, debating if he should burden Arthur even more than he already had. The man was certainly like an older brother to Matthew, but how much could he divulge to him without having the others overhear him.

"Spit it out. Obviously something is trouble you, otherwise you would be sticking to Gilbert's side like you normally do. Not that there's anything wrong with that," Arthur said, waving his hands, careful not to spill his beer, in defence.

"Normally maybe, but we haven't seen each other in weeks really and then-"

"Ha! You're not as strong as you think you are, you potato bastard." Lovino pointed at Ludwig with a smug look on his face, startling Arthur and Matthew for a moment.

Matthew and Arthur watched as Ludwig spoke low to Feliciano, who was making sure the German wasn't hurt. It was nice to see how much the two cared for each other, but Matthew knew the two had yet to confess their own feelings for each other. Ludwig certainly made exceptions to many of the rules he followed when it came to the young Italian. It was then Matthew noted Gilbert was nowhere to be seen.

"You were saying?" Arthur shook his head before taking a sip of the beer, only to scrunch up his face in disgust. "Cheap beer? That's unusual for those two. I guess they save the German beer for themselves."

"Nein, you just happened to pick out one of the last ones from the last time we partied. If I remember, you totally brought that beer, saying you were broke and couldn't afford anything else." Gilbert slung his arm around Arthur, a sly grin on his face. "So, what are you two talking about? Shouldn't you be enjoying the company of everyone else?"

Matthew stood by, ringing his wrists nervously. His heart felt heavy as he realised Gilbert had only come over here because of Arthur. Gilbert was mad about something and Matthew was terrified to find out. What if Gilbert wanted to stop being friends? His breath shortened a little as he tried to get a grip on his emotions.

"For your information, we were having a rather important conversation and it wasn't meant for you. So shove off you narcissistic arse. Besides, you're the host, you should be making sure Antonio and Ludwig don't break the table like they did last night." Arthur shoved off Gilbert's arm with his free hand, stepping slightly away from him. He took notice of Matthew's strange condition, but kept silent.

"Why don't you tell him that? I have something I need to talk with Matthew about." Gilbert lightly pushed Matthew to lead him in the opposite direction of Arthur and towards the kitchen. Arthur was about to grab for Gilbert, but the Prussian had already gotten Matthew out of his reach.

"Me? Bu-"

"Just trust me, it's nothing bad. Promise." Arthur waited until Matthew simply nodded his head before heading to the others to give them privacy. Gilbert set down his beer on the counter before propping himself on the edge. "So, want to tell me what's bother you? Normally I would wait for you to tell me, but obviously something is wrong. Even Feliciano is getting worried and you looked like you were about to like have a panic attack there."

Matthew blinked at the sudden question, having though Gilbert wanted to talk about something else entirely. "What's bothering me?"

"Ja, you've been more quiet than usual and ever since we grabbed the pizza, you sorta just stared out the window. When I asked you if you were okay, you just said "I'm fine." Which by the way is the lamest answer ever. I mean if it's something I said or did, you just need to tell me." Gilbert shrugged, his eyes staring at Matthew, giving the impression he had nothing to hide and was not about to let Matthew off the hook with some random excuse.

Matthew on the other hand, couldn't really look at Gilbert. His eyes darting from his face to the floor and back again. His emotions were a swirl of chaos, making it difficult for him to even articulate them. Maybe if he had spoken to Arthur about it first it would be a different story. He cursed himself for relying so heavily on other people. These were his emotions, he just had to get a grip on them. Taking a deep breath, he nodded his head.

"I-It's nothing you've done. I j-ju-just can't seem to understand what I'm feeling. On the bus, I hated you for not responding to a text message, and then when I saw you, I was rather happy, and then now. Seeing you with other friends, I guess." Matthew sighed.

When he said it out loud, he felt like a jerk and someone who needed to get a better grip on himself. He felt as if he was turning into a different person all because he was unsure of where their relationship was going. The internal struggle of just what Matthew wanted, and what Gilbert potentially wanted. Ever since the talk with Francis and Arthur, Matthew had spent several nights wondering if he wanted the same thing as Gilbert or not. It was hard to tell, but as he delved deeper, he found things about himself he had yet to discover. This new side of him, the jealous part, he wanted nothing to do with.

"Go on." Gilbert urged, as he crossed his arms waiting for the rest of the answer.

"I guess," Matthew said to try and start again. "I was a bit jealous. You're surrounded by all these people, and yet you hang out with me. I'm just a quiet college kid who doesn't do anything but hit the books and plays hockey." Matthew, glances back to see the rest of the groups were still talking happily to one another, enjoying their pizza.

"Matthew."

Matthew shuts his eyes, waiting for the worst to come from Gilbert, about just how much of an idiot he was for even thinking he could be someone worth more than just a flower on the wall. He was never meant to stand out in the crowds, or to really find himself. He was supposed to only do what society wanted of him, not to go against it. Gilbert would never want to see him ever again and at the moment, Matthew couldn't blame him. He felt like the lowliest of creatures, wanting nothing more than to crawl into a hole somewhere to never come out again. Perhaps it would have been for the best if he had just kept to himself instead of trying to delude himself that he could have friends and actually have a life worth living. But now, he resigned himself to just live a boring life; one where he wasn't happy at all. Instead he felt a tap on his head, to which he rapidly blinked and saw a smirk on Gilbert's face. Gilbert had hit him with the edge of his beer bottle, but only enough to grab his attention.

"Dummkopf. You should have come to me sooner. Jealousy is a natural reaction you know, especially if that person is close to you. As for your worth, I'd paid your weight in gold and then some. Just because you don't see how awesome you are, doesn't mean others can't. So stop with the self-loathing and self-pity for a moment. Enjoy the company of the others around you and remember one thing Matthew Williams."

Gilbert set his beer bottle on the counter before stepping closer to Matthew. The two looked at each other, Gilbert only slightly shorter than Matthew. Under normal circumstances, Matthew would have turned bright red, or even tried to put to some distance between them, but not this time. Matthew stood there, quiet, in shock. Perhaps there was some merit to what Gilbert said. It wasn't until Gilbert tugged at his collar to bring him down low enough to kiss his forehead that Matthew started to regain the feeling of his body enough to blush.

"Never forget, when I said I would wait for you, I meant it."

The deed done, Gilbert stepped back to grab his beer and went back to the party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for 'disappearing', but I was backed up in school work and a few other matters. Thank-you so much for all the comments and the favourites and subscriptions. It certainly made my day to see them all! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. I'll try to write more on a schedule to get more of this out. Thanks for all the support.
> 
> Any criticism, and comments are welcome.


	11. Home Made Soup

Weeks had passed since the incident at the party, but it hardly stopped Matthew from thinking about it every once in awhile. Gilbert was slowly proving what he declared when they first started to become friends. Matthew was still conflicted. But while he tried to sort out his own jumbled up feelings, school work started piling up. So for the past week he was busy trying to keep up with essays and reading assignments. He slowly ignored the signs of a stuffed up nose or a coughing fit here or there. The forewarnings were ignored until Wednesday morning before the semi-finals.

A pounding head and scratchy throat greeted Matthew as he blearily opened his eyes to the sound of his alarm clock going off. His eyes were itchy and hurt even though only the soft morning light filled the room, creating normally a cozy atmosphere on a regular day. But today, Matthew groaned as he attempted to find his alarm clock through the blurred shapes next to him, knocking his glasses off the small bedside table.

"Of course." Matthew coughed a little to try and clear his scratchy throat.

Waking up with a stuffed nose and scratchy throat were nothing new to Matthew. On more than one occasion if the air was rather dry or a sudden change in the temperature outside would leave him with a pounding headache the next day. But this, the congested feeling leaving his head feeling fuzzy or like cotton balls filling his head, was something he did not want to deal with at the moment. Crawling out from the warmth of the blankets with a shiver, Matthew slowly made his way across the room and opened the door only to find Alfred poised as if he were about to knock.

"Al?" Matthew attempted to clear his throat again.

"Woah, dude, are you okay? You sound like shit." Alfred quickly brought their foreheads together, earning a grumble from Matthew as he tried to lean away.

"I'm fine. I just need to clear my throat with some water." Skirting around Alfred once he was let go, Matthew went straight for the kitchen, his head spinning a bit.

"You're not going to class today. Get some water and then head back to bed. I'll get some medicine for you." Matthew turned to see a frown on Alfred's face. He was being serious.

"I'm fi-"

"No you're not! You have a fever and need to stay in bed today. No buts." Alfred headed into the bathroom, but kept his sights on Matthew, who grabbed a cup and poured some water into it.

Maybe Alfred was right. Maybe he should stay in bed for one day. His life didn't depend on going to school today. Wait, he had to go to practice at least.

"Al, I need to go. I have practice. If I don't go, I won't be able to play in the next big game this weekend. You know how coach is about these sorts of things." Matthew drank the water in a hurry and attempted to get back to his room only to find his vision swimming before him. Slipping a little, Matthew found a way to balance himself by bracing himself on the wall.

"How can you skate if you can't even walk? I'm sure if you explain that you're sick he'll still let you play. I doubt he's that harsh." Alfred came back with a bottle of medicine, setting it on the counter before he helped Matthew stand up. "Come on, back into bed you go."

Matthew protested a bit more, but he followed the nudge Alfred gave him. There was just no arguing when it came to Alfred suddenly being mature and the responsible adult. Honestly, Matthew hated it when Alfred attempted to be the response adult, considering he only did it when it was convenient for him, instead of all the time. At least he knew he could count on Alfred when things were tough.

"I won't be home until late tonight, but I'll have Francis stop by with soup later. I'll stop by before my class to bring you some meds. Sound good?"

Matthew grumbled a response as he snuggled back under the covers, glad Alfred made him go back to bed. His eyes burned and as he felt them close. His body slowly relaxed. He drifted off when Alfred closed the door.

Matthew woke to a gentle nudge. Alfred had come back with medicine for him to take and some water. Obediently, Matthew took what was given to him, not even caring what it was so long as it cleared his fuzzy head. Downing the medication with water, Matthew set the half full glass on his bedside table.

"I ran into Gilbert so he'll be the one to bring you soup later instead of France. Apparently he overheard us talking and wanted to show his superior cooking skills. I'll be back later tonight. Try not to get out of bed unless you need to." Alfred's voice was low, the complete opposite of his usual loud personality.

Matthew nodded his head, regretting the movement. Feeling a little nauseous, he snuggled deeper into the covers, letting out a groan.

"Alright, I get it. Bye Mattie, feel better."

Another groan in acknowledge came from Matthew as the door shut and he was able to get some more sleep.

* * *

"Birdie?"

Matthew snuggled into the blankets. While the medicine made him slightly more tolerant to moving his head, he did not want to deal with anyone at the moment. The fuzzy feeling made it hard for him to even tell what time it was. had only a few minutes passed, or had several hours? The door slowly creaked open.

"There you are Birdie. It's about dinner time. Do you want some soup? It's chicken noodle." Matthew could see the blurred shape of Gilbert's head, but couldn't tell much from this distance. His voice was on the soft side, and the amount of concern was endearing. So it was dinner time. He had slept for a few hours and barely felt better.

Coughing to clear his throat, Matthew made an attempt to say something, but found his voice was mostly gone. He nodded his head to give Gilbert his approval. While Matthew might not have felt hungry he knew drinking plenty of fluids and eating at least a bit of soup was good for him. Besides, how could he pass up homemade chicken soup? Not being able to see Gilbert's face made it hard to tell what Gilbert was thinking, but with the concern laced in his voice, Matthew would humour Gilbert as best he could.

"Good. I'll bring you a bowl. Have you had medicine?"

"I took some before Alfred left." Matthew's voice was low and hoarse, even cracking at the end. He needed some water, but he knew it would take the weird thick taste in his mouth. It was from sleeping with his mouth open since his nose was stuffed up. If he was honest, he wanted to crawl into a whole and stay there for a while.

"Then you're probably ready for some more." Gilbert disappeared again.

He reappeared with a steaming bowl of soup, medicine, and a glass of water. Matthew had put on his glasses, now clearly able to see Gibert as he juggled the items around dangerously. Matthew smiled. A few months ago and he would only have Alfred taking care of him, but here was Gilbert, who even brought soup.

"This is homemade soup. When I heard you were sick I knew this would make you feel better. Don't tell Francis, but I'm pretty sure this is better than even his." Gilbert set the water on the bedside table along with the medicine. "Can you eat yourself or do you need help?"

Voice still weak, Matthew took the bowl. He raised an eyebrow, waiting for Gilbert to challenge him. He was sick, not broken. Gilbert nodded his head, sitting at the edge of Matthew's bed, watching. Wringing his hands, Gilbert seemed a little more restless than usual. Matthew blew on the soup, trying to figure out what would make him so nervous. Sipping the soup a little, Matthew found it hard to swallow at first and so was thankful most of the soup was actually broth. It went down a lot smoother after the first sip. Letting go of the spoon, he gave Gilbert a thumbs up.

"So you like it? Gut. I'm glad." Gilbert sighed in relief. "Alfred said he'd be late, do you want me to stay till he gets back?"

Matthew shook his head. He knew Gilbert would only get bored or even worse, get sick too. No, it was best if Gilbert left after Matthew finished eating. Matthew continued to eat, spoonful by spoonful, yet it seemed he had hardly made a dent when his stomach protested he was full. Holding out the bowl, Gilbert took it.

"Are you sure that's all you want to eat?" Gilbert bit his lower lip.

Matthew nodded, coughing a little. He pulled the covers closer when the coughing subsided. Gilbert reached for the glass of water and the medicine.

"Take this. I'll put this in the fridge for later if you get hungry and leave Alfred a note. He better not eat it. I hope you feel better Birdie." Gilbert stood up, putting the bowl on the bedside table. "Don't push it."

Gilbert handed Matthew the medicine and the water, waiting patiently for him to take it. Afterwards he leaned down, tucked Matthew in, who nodded absently, eyes already drooping. Gilbert gave Matthew a kiss on the forehead before picking up the bowl and glass. Matthew started to drift off to sleep again, warmth heating his cheeks.

* * *

"How you doing bro?" Alfred asked Matthew the next morning. Matthew was snuggled in a blanket on the couch, some cartoon was playing on the TV.

"A bit better. Not as fuzzy headed, but I probably shouldn't go to school." Matthew coughed a little. Alfred brought him a cup of steaming tea.

"Alright. I'll tell the coach for ya. Get better." Alfred ruffled his hair, a grin on his lips. Of course now that Matthew was not direly sick, Alfred had returned to being loud.

"Bye Al," Matthew said as he snuggled into the blankets, blowing on the tea.

Alfred waved bye, backpack on one shoulder and a coat in his free hand. Yet as Alfred opened the door, Matthew heard him talking with someone. Curious, Matthew got up, being careful to not get his feet tangled with his polar bear house slippers. Ludwig was at the door, seeming slightly troubled if the extra creases in his forehead were anything to go by.

"Oh, Mattie. Looks like Gil is sick, but Ludwig has a major test and can't watch him." Alfred leaned back on the doorframe to let Ludwig catch sight of Matthew.

"I knew he would get sick." Matthew sighed, knowing it was his fault. "Bring him up. I'm feeling better so I'll look after him."

"Are you sure?" Alfred's brows furrowed, but knew once Matthew's mind was made up it was done.

"Yeah. It's my fault he's sick eh?" The instant relief on Ludwig's face was all Matthew needed.

"He'll be up in a minute. Danke." Ludwig nodded his head with respect before heading back to his floor.

"Don't over do it," Alfred warned before slipping out the door to get to the bus stop.

Ludwig brought a very disorientated Gilbert into the apartment, putting him on the couch where Matthew was previously. With another rushed thanks, Ludwig dropped a bag of essentials next to the couch and was off to catch the bus to class with Alfred.

Matthew closed the door behind Ludwig and leaned against it for a moment. He had no idea how Gilbert acted while sick, hopefully he wasn't too much of a baby like Alfred normally was. Sipping his tea, Matthew slowly made his way to the couch to check on Gilbert. Ludwig told him Gilbert already took some meds, but the fever was pretty high.

"Guess I'll take care of you this time. Though I can't make home made soup, so I hope you'll be okay with just soup from a can." Matthew put a free hand against Gilbert's hand, using the back of his hand. It was pretty hot. The first thing to do was to break the fever.

"Birdie?" Gilbert shuffled under the blanket to lean closer to Matthew's hand.

"I'll be right back," Matthew said. Taking a few steps into the kitchen, he placed his empty mug into the sink. He then grabbed a towel, wet it, wrung it out, and then placed it over Gilbert's forehead. "There. Is that a bit better."

"…Stay." Gilbert reached out, holding Matthew's sleeve when he tried to move around the couch. He had planned on sit in the recliner to give Gilbert space on the couch.

"I'm just going to sit over there." Matthew pointed to the chair. Gilbert shook his head. "Where should I sit then?"

Gilbert shuffled under the blankets, groaning a little with the effort. Making room on the couch, he patted the space next to him. So Gilbert was the clingy type. Well, it didn't matter too much since Matthew was the one who infected Gilbert in the first place.

"We're both sick so it shouldn't matter how close we sit." Gilbert said, as if reading Matthew's mind. He spread the blanket between them. Then placed his head on Matthew's shoulder, who said nothing. Matthew leaned over to make sure Gilbert's shivering form was mostly covered by the blanket. He tried to hid the fond smile with his curls.

"Is that why you got sick? So you could stay with me?" Matthew whispered. A nod came from Gilbert, as he sniffled. "You're something else Gil."

"You know you love me." Gilbert coughed a little then snuggled closer.

"…"

Matthew focused his attention to the TV, feeling tired even though he wasn't as sick as the day before. Somehow this scene felt comfortable, peaceful even. At this point, he could hardly find a reason not to give Gilbert a chance at something more. While his own feelings were still not as strong, Matthew knew there was something more than just the feeling of friendship. But how did they cross that bridge? Should he wait for Gilbert to ask him again? Or should he take up the courage to say something to Gilbert instead? As he let the questions float around, he felt his eyes close and his head heavy, the noise of the TV went into the background.

"Maybe it is because I'm starting to love you." Matthew whispered as he let his head rest against Gilbert's. He hoped Gilbert was either asleep to notice, or too feverish to remember.


	12. Winner of a Different Kind

The day of the hockey semi-final came and Matthew was still not allowed to play. He was still sneezing and his nose was stuffed; the aftereffects of being sick. Instead he sat on the bench, watching his teammates go out and play. The substitute for Matthew was good, but the lack of team experience hurt the team. There were moments Matthew's grip on his jersey tightened to the point it left wrinkles.

"Mattie, you gotta help me. I keep messing up." Claus, the sub, asked.

Matthew nodded, determined to see his team win with or without him.

"You need to watch the opponent's movements along with Matthias and stop trying to play like me. He's the one giving you the signs." Matthew pointed to a rather loud blonde, who clapped another player on the back. "If you do that you'll be fine. If you don't think you can shoot, pass it. Set up the plays like you usually do in practice. You can do it."

The advice seemed to have helped a little. Claus stopped trying to mimic the way Matthew played and did what he normally during practice. Slowly, the team came together, widening the score between them and their rivals. They won, with a four-point lead. The moment the buzzer sounded, Claus skated up towards Matthew, hugging him tightly thanking him for the advice. Pleased, their coach told them they had the next day off, meaning no practice. Claus, decided to have a celebration inviting everyone to his house.

Throughout the game, Gilbert, who was bundled up quite warmly, sat in the stands texting Matthew. Gilbert made sure Matthew was okay with having to sit out, which of course Matthew was bitter about, but knew better than to really get caught up by it all. Besides, knowing that he could at least give advice or help hand out the water to his team helped a little.

Claus came up to Matthew while they were all in the locker room, the plans for the party buzzing in the air. Matthew was the first to finish changing, so he waited for the rest of the team.

"Gilbert can come too if he wants. He's the one who helped during practice when he could." Claus grinned, patted Matthew on the back and walked back to his locker to put on his shirt.

* * *

The two were standing near each other at the party. Matthew couldn't necessarily focus on the party so much as his own thoughts. Everyone was talking about Claus and how well he played. Doubt slowly crept in. Matthew wondered if Claus would replace him on the team and suddenly he would be the one benched. Hockey was the only sport he could ever try and beat Alfred at. The sport was the one thing Matthew felt proud of. He feared it would be all taken away with Claus having scored the final point. He knew the doubt was irrational at best, but he couldn't stop the thoughts. When Gilbert or anyone struck up a conversation with him, he had to ask several times what the other said because he just couldn't focus on them as much as his fear of being replaced.

"Okay, birdie. What's the matter? Obviously it's something if you just stand there lost in thought half the time." Gilbert nudged him a little, the hint of beer on his breath. Matthew volunteered to drive since he couldn't drink just yet.

"No-Nothing." Matthew said quickly. "I….I just feel like I let them all down."

"Let them down? What gave you that idea? You guys won." Gilbert set his beer down on the nearest flat surface, focusing his attention to Matthew.

"I wasn't able to play because of my stuffed nose. Of all things." Matthew crossed his arms awkwardly across his chest, a red plastic cup filled with juice in one hand

"Birdie, you know you're probably the one thinking that way right? Watch," Gilbert turned to Claus"Yo, what do you think of Mattie?"

"Huh? What do you mean?" Claus came closer, clearly a little smashed from the sluggish movements.

"Do you think he let the team down?" Gilbert asked.

"Nah man. He was just sick, everyone gets sick. It was as honour to play for 'im. Though I made a lot of mistakes, I bet we'da won a lot easier with him playing. The advice was totally what helped in the end. Get better, yeah?" He patted, or attempted to pat Matthew's shoulder. He missed, landing on Matthew's chest instead. "Sorry man."

Matthew could see Gilbert tense a little, but soon Claus left to get another drink and mingle with another group of players. Gilbert unclenched his tightened fists, forcing a smile. Matthew set down his cup next to Gilbert's empty beer.

"Do you see now?" Gilbert asked.

Matthew nodded. What would he have done without Gilbert? Wallowed in these thoughts all alone at home. Alfred was too busy with school work to come to the game, but he promised to be there for the finals since Matthew was going to play. Arthur and Francis were having their own problems and it wasn't as if either understood hockey either. The only one from the apartments were Kiku who took pictures for the newspaper, Gilbert, and any player who lived there.

"Besides, it was sorta my fault you didn't get better soon. You took care of me when I was pretty out of it." Gilbert smiled sheepishly. "I…I still remember you let me use you as a pillow and all. So danke. Not everyone would have done that."

Staring for a moment, Matthew only blinked. Gilbert blamed himself, but he had nothing to do with how long a cold lasts. Matthew shook his head with a small smile.

"O-Oh, ummm, sure. I mean I got you sick in the first place. It was the least I could do, but I don't think it was your fault." A blush bloomed on Matthew's face.

"If you say so."

Seeing Gilbert give up suddenly was a little odd.

"Don't get me wrong, I still think it's my fault, but then if I argue back it will only go into circles Mattie. You know that." Gilbert laughed. "Oddly though, I had this dream where you said something, but I mean, I know it wasn't true." Gilbert shrugged. "I'm just digging myself a new hole, just ignore me."

"….What did I say?" Matthew tried to keep the horrified look off his face. This was Gilbert after all, the dream could have been about anything or anyone. There was no way Gilbert had heard him confess to him.

"Oh you know," Gilbert's own pale face was flushed a deep red and not because of the beer he had. "Y-You know what? Nevermind I said anything. It was just a dream anyway. There was no way you said you could be falling in love with me. BUT I me-mean tth-that's impossible. Like I said, just a silly dream. Don't worry too much about it."

Gilbert laughed nervously. Matthew stood there, eyes wide. So Gilbert had heard him in the end. The dream Gilbert had was the last thing Matthew said to him. The shock wore off after a minute, Gilbert stood there, waiting for some sort of response. Was he waiting for Matthew to tell him it was all just a joke and it would be fine?

"Look, birdie. Like I said, it was all just a dream. I-I shouldn't have said a word. Okay? Just forget about it. I know you don't-"

"Gil, shut up." Matthew said quietly.

He grabbed Gilbert by the arm and took him outside. Those who noticed called out to the two, knowing of Gilbert's crush on Matthew. None of what they said helped the tomato red blooming on Matthew's face. He tried to hid it from Gilbert with his curls. Gilbert stumbled along, half from the alcohol in his system and half from Matthew's tugging him along until Matthew slowed down the moment they were outside. For once Gilbert kept his mouth shut, unsure of what was going to happen. Had he just lost best friend because of what he said?

Matthew let go of Gilbert's hand, taking a few steps forward, but didn't turn around. Silence filled the void. A few minutes passed, until almost five minutes had gone by. Gilbert just couldn't handle it anymore. Just what was going on in Matthew's head?

"The dream you had. Don't forget it," Matthew said quietly.

He couldn't face Gilbert with the blush on his face or the fear he couldn't say what he wanted because he was too nervous. What if Gilbert no longer liked him? What if he found someone else? All the irrational feels he could think of came flooding all at once as Gilbert stayed silent. Gilbert was never silent, he always had something to say. After a few minutes Matthew peaked a little over his shoulders to see Gilbert looking at him with wide eyes and his mouth hanging open. A new blush formed as Matthew looked straight ahead again.

"We-Well say something."

The demand seemed to have woken Gilbert from his stupor. Matthew heard the shuffle of Gilbert's feet, yet he still jumped a little at seeing Gilbert suddenly in front of him. Taking Matthew's hands in his own, Gilbert grinned.

"Does this mean what I think?" he asked.

Matthew couldn't look Gilbert long enough in the eyes to say anything. Instead, he just nodded his head. Gilbert's hands cupped Matthew's face.

"Hey, look at me."

Matthew shifted his eyes to look at Gilbert. The same nervous energy he felt, Gilbert reflected. The palms on either side of his face were slightly damp. Both were blushing and while Matthew stammered, so had Gilbert towards the beginning. Now Gilbert got exactly what he wanted since the very beginning. A smile broke out on Gilbert's face while Matthew continued to look at him and not turn away.

"Are you sure? I don't want to pressure you," Gilbert said quietly.

Matthew bit his lip a little trying to find the words.

"…I-Yes." He nodded for good measure. "I talked with Francis and Arthur. I did a bit of research on my own. I'm sure."

Gilbert pulled him into a hug. He spun Matthew slightly in the air, all the while laughing. Matthew yelped a little at the sudden feeling of his feet leaving the ground slightly but trusted Gilbert not to let him fall. Gilbert buried his head into Matthew's neck once Matthew's feet were back on the ground. He sighed for a moment, his breath tickling Matthew a little. Seeming satisfied, Gilbert pulled back, but kept his hands around Matthew's waist. Matthew could tell Gilbert was cautious, the touch light so if Matthew wanted to he could break the contact. Matthew stayed right where he was.

"What research did you do?" Gilbert asked, a grin on his face.

"Umm…..j-just you know different sexualities and s-stuff like that." Matthew wondered just how many times could someone blush before their face couldn't change a deeper shade of red.

"Oh. So, you were just-"

"Yup, trying to find myself."

"Are you going to tell me what you found?" Gilbert asked, genuine curiosity in his tone.

"I need to have the emotional connection first before I can fall for someone. If I don't have the connection, I won't have the possibilities of actually being able to return romantic feelings." Matthew shrugged.

"So my getting know you and actually being your friend first actually helped my chances? Wunderbar! Everyone thought I was either pushing you or just hurting myself by staying with you, but to know that it was actually a good thing." Gilbert laughed before pulling Matthew into another hug, this time tighter.

Matthew could honestly say he loved the tight embrace, despite feeling a bit embarrassed at it all. Gilbert just had a way of sneaking his way right through Matthew's defences and into his heart. Though he was sure his own feelings still didn't completely match Gilbert's, he figured with time he would come to love Gilbert just as much as Gilbert claimed to love him. For now, while the confession was there, he still wanted to take everything a bit slow. After all his one crush had been after Alfred and not him. If things went south with Gilbert, he didn't want to be in too deep.

"Birdie, hey, come back to me," Gilbert said pulling Matthew out of his thoughts.

"Huh?"

"You looked like you were far away. Are you okay? D-Do you not want me to…umm…hold you like this or something?"

Matthew shook his head. "I'm fine, but can we take it slow?"

"Of course Birdie! Whatever you want." Gilbert leaned up slightly and kissed his forehead. "Will you go out with me Matthew Williams?"

"….Yes," Matthew said sheepishly.

"About time!"

Both turned to look up at a window full of hockey players. A few were leaning out and others were pressed in behind them. Matthew's blush returned tenfold and Gilbert cackled, not letting Matthew go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the long wait for this chapter. A lot of stuff happened during the summer and a lot is still going on. It's all just life and no one really cares about that stuff XD I hope you enjoyed the chapter.
> 
> I almost want to leave it like this and call it finished, but let me know if you want to see more as their relationship progresses. Thanks


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